


Please Come Home

by Haroldmay (abirdonalilactree)



Category: Video Blogging RPF
Genre: Angst, Angst and Hurt/Comfort, Death, Fluff and Angst, Happy Ending, Hurt/Comfort, I don't know how this happened, I'm so sorry, Long Distance Relationship, M/M, Meeting for the first time, So much death, Strangers to Friends to Lovers, Temporary Character Death, a bit of angst and a bit of fluff, fantasy I guess?, of course I can only write talking cats, this is a complete disaster
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-04-13
Updated: 2020-10-26
Packaged: 2021-03-01 17:42:25
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, Major Character Death
Chapters: 2
Words: 23,624
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23631058
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/abirdonalilactree/pseuds/Haroldmay
Summary: Prompt:long distance relationship: dan and kev meet for the first time.~~~NEW CHAPTERNOW WITH EVEN MORE DEATH
Relationships: Daniel Condren/Kevin O'Reilly
Comments: 22
Kudos: 47
Collections: 413 Fic Exchange





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

  * For [ddaydream](https://archiveofourown.org/users/ddaydream/gifts).



> Happy RT-Day, everyone.  
> I feel the need to say this again, please keep this away from dan and kevin and everyone affiliated with them. 
> 
> Also: This is obviously not how things happened and I took a lot of freedom with this. And I want you to look at it as what it is: a work of fiction.  
> To be clear: I made most of this up.  
> Don't show this to anyone. Especially not Dan or Kevin. Let this stay in its own little corner of the internet. 
> 
> Also also:  
> dear ddaydream, I hope you'll like this and you are having a nice RT-Day. <3
> 
> ~*~
> 
> Prompt:  
> long distance relationship: dan and kev meet in person for the first time
> 
> ~*~

Collecting souls is hard work.  
It's hard in that sense that it can break your heart. 

With his only companion George, a sarcastic cat-like creature of darkness, at his side he had lived for many centuries. He had seen empires rise and fall. He had seen people live and die. He had seen rich and poor being buried next to each other. He had seen light and darkness and the horrors of many wars. He had seen too much.  
And he was tired.

These days he has taken the name Daniel. He liked the meaning of it: "God is my judge".  
Daniel was also a Hebrew prophet whose story is told in the book of Daniel in the Old Testament. Book-Daniel lived during the Jewish captivity in Babylon, where he served in the court of the King, rising to prominence by interpreting the Kings dreams. The book also presents Book-Daniel's four visions of the end of the world. 

Due to the popularity of the biblical character, the name came into use in England during the Middle ages. Though it became rare by the 15th century, it was revived after the Protestant Reformation. This was also the time our Daniel took the name for himself. 

His other name alike, the Swiss mathematician Daniel Bernoulli (1700-1782) on the other hand, was one of his least favourite people.  
Damn, he hated math. Especially statistics. 

But that was a long time ago. 

Winter came and went many times.  
These days he had more time for himself.  
The creation of the Internet had been one of the greatest inventions of humanity. And he found himself spending more and more time googling stuff and changing Wikipedia articles. 

Due to new working restrictions he was bound to Ireland in the year 2000. And new colleagues were raised from the dead to be bound to collect souls in other parts of the world.  
Each country had to have their own Grim Reaper. Although Daniel preferred the Japanese word 'shinigami' a lot more. It sounded more friendly and less ... grim.

First he had been mortally offended - pun intended- by the changes that actually turned out to make things a lot easier for him, and soon he found a small apartment in Dublin where he lived peacefully for the next few years. Browsing the internet was a great distraction from the horrors he saw each and every day. Soon he found a website called 'YouTube'. 

He was there on the 24th of April 2005 when the first ever YouTube video was posted. 'Me at the zoo' was its title. 

He liked videos with animals in them.  
Years later he became a huge fan of zXNoRegretzzXz and the "how to annoy" series. It wasn't long until he decided, that gaming YouTube was his favourite part of the Internet.  
He became a huge fan of this Kevin guy. But suddenly he disappeared. 

As far as Daniel knew, Kevin soon after owned a game shop somewhere in Ireland. He never searched for him.  
The internet got a little bit more empty.  
Dan didn't know anymore what to do with the time assigned to him.  
He started to play some video games himself.

Collecting souls had changed and changed again. Since 2007 death notifications got sent per E-mail. This had made the job a lot easier. The flipside was still that it took a lot of time to bring the collected souls 'downstairs' where each and every soul got a place assigned in one of the nine circles.

Aside from the obvious filpside of this job, of course. It was one hell of a depressing job.  
Dan was grateful for everything that could make him laugh. And *everyone* that could make him laugh.

He hadn't heard from his favourite YouTuber in a long time until one day he got a notification after a car accident that made him stop in his tracks and sit down for a moment.  
Kevin o'Reilly had been hit by a car.  
Daniel did something he had only done before once in the 6000 years of his existence, when a young boy had stressed induced stomach ulcers. He ignored a direct order.  
Without a pinch of guilt he deleted the e-mail and rewatched the how to annoy series for the next few hours.  
He wasn't entirely sure why exactly he had done this.  
But there was enough death anyway.  
He didn't exactly keep track.  
But the humans did.

In 2014 there were 29,095 deaths total in Ireland.  
But between collecting souls he still found time to watch videos. 

"Live and let live, except for the part, where I'm gonna kill you.", he wrote in big red letters on the wall of his apartment, one night.  
It was supposed to sound motivational.  
He soon started to feel like it probably wasn't. But he left it there anyway, because it reminded him of Kevin. And Kevin's videos always cheered him up.

In 2016 call me Kevin was suddenly back.  
Daniel couldn't be happier.  
This person had the mind of a dangerous psychopath, the body of a model and the voice of an angel.  
Dan started to spend more time on YouTube than ever. 

_______

Then Gamescon in Dublin, 2017 happened.

After too much beer, Dan had decided to go there. This was his chance to finally meet Kevin. (He never wanted to abuse his power and just manifest at his door step. Or something equally ridiculous.) Their first meeting had to happen naturally. Everything else just wasn't right. So he threw on his best human form, a young man with fluffy brown hair and a sweet smile, and got in his car, a black jaguar 1978 classic xj12l.  
His only goal was to meet his hero call me Kevin. 

While waiting he collected the souls of a 16 year old who ate a peanut butter sandwich as a dare despite their peanut butter allergy. And the soul of sixty seven year old who went up too many stairs in a too heavy costume. 

Patiently he waited for hours (which wasn't long, when you were 6000 years old) until most of the visitors had left. When most of the people were gone, the Internet came back and he saw the tweet.

'Sorry I couldn't make it, friends.  
I'm stuck in a traffic jam.' 

He wouldn't meet Kevin that day.  
Mission failed. 

Back at home, Dan sat back in his chair.  
He really didn't want to be this person™. 

The person that leaves a comment on everything their hero posts. And sends them messages. And has three different fan accounts.  
But there he was and he was far beyond the point of being able to stop.  
It was weird.  
A part of his brain knew it. But the other part just wouldn't listen.

He fought against himself. But he lost. 

No. 

He rewatched some videos to calm down.  
When Kevin killed, it seemed so easy.  
It seemed so beautiful.  
He was an angel of death. Even if it only was for video games. 

Dan sighed.  
Then he sent the tweet anyway. 

'Waited for hours to finally meet my Senpai call me Kevin, but he didn't show up.  
Coward.' 

*Please notice me*

He didn't. 

_____

Time went by. In his head he gave up the idea of ever being able to meet Kevin any time soon. But what was time anyway? 

When he got the job offer in Japan, he saw no reason to decline.  
Japan was lovely. The crime rate wasn't as high as he had expected. And there was a reasonable Internet connection.  
Also he loved the cherry blossom trees.  
And the culture.  
And-

He never felt like he was doing the right thing.  
It soon became clear, that his metaphorical heart had stayed in Ireland. 

That's why he soon found himself in the only Irish pub in Japan.  
It was nice to listen to people talking. Most of them were either middle aged or students who were too young to be there but tried to sneak some room temperature beer anyway. 

He only made friends with the Barkeeper Molly. It happened from time to time. That he made a friend. Everyone needs a friend, he liked to say. Molly was in her mid fifties and immediately adopted him as her child, just like she did with all the other guests.  
Dan was thankful for it.

This was his life.  
Work. Pub. Youtube. 

Every night like a sacred ritual, he watched Kevin's videos. He commented on each and every video. Just encouraging stuff most of the time.  
Most of the time. 

The comments ranged from:

'Please show us the rest of until dawn' 

To

'the only thing that could be better than you wearing this shirt, would be you not wearing this shirt.' 

Then he usually went on Instagram. Sadly Kevin didn't post a lot there. But some of the fan accounts had posted art. And he decided to buy some stickers.  
After long consideration, he also sent pictures of soup to Kevin.  
It had something very calming, being able to watch a new video of Kevin almost every single day. He imagined he could see in his eyes if he had had a good day or a bad day.

Sometimes after a lot of beer in the only Irish pub in all of Japan, he wrote Fanfictions. They sounded stupid. Of course they were stupid. And he was well aware of that. But that didn't stop him from posting them online. 

'Jim Pickens tries to murder you. But then the most handsome man, you have ever seen, saves you. Kevin takes your hand and leads you out of his basement. Suddenly a thunder. Then lightning. A meteor...' 

When he woke up the next morning, he knew it was bad. It was really bad.  
He knew he was obsessed.  
But there was no going back.  
Then he saw that some people had left likes.  
Maybe it wasn't that bad after all.

He read it again.  
Yes, it was.

*But* on the other hand: what was the point in being anything at all if he couldn't be stupid at least sometimes.

No one got hurt. Right?  
A crime without victims.  
Was it even really a crime?

He opened the document again and reread a paragraph.  
Yes, it was.

There had to be another way to get Kevin's attention.

_____

One night he had an idea.  
He took his old camera and his favourite game and just started filming.  
Actually putting a good version of it on the Internet was harder than he would have ever expected. But he did it again. And again. And with every video it got easier.  
And then the subscribers came out of nowhere.

He started filming YouTube videos like mad.  
Against his expectations he gained followers. 

What really blew his mind was that people started spotting similarities between him and Kevin. Of course they did. Kevin was his biggest role-model after all.  
Some thought they were the same person for some reason. And that was the nicest compliment he could get.  
He gained more followers. Some requested a collab.

*Please notice me. *

Until one day he did.

____

It was the middle of the night in Japan and he sat in the only Irish pub in the whole country, when his twitter gave a notification. 

First he thought nothing of it. Twitter gave notifications all the time. 

"Everything alright, sweetheart?", Molly asked as she brought him some lemonade. 

"As the youths nowadays say: yeet." 

"That's nice to hear.", Molly said cheerfully. She was used to Daniels odd expressions. 

When she went to the next table, he finally checked his phone.  
He had to do a double take.  
Then he had to turn off his phone and turn it on again.  
This was not a fan account.  
The real call me Kevin had just-

Omg.

Cmk: I heard there is a new Irish boi in town. 

This couldn't happen. This wasn't real.  
He blinked. And blinked again.  
He had to answer immediately. 

This was so surreal. The real call me kevin had dmed him.

*what now?*

He typed and deleted and typed and deleted. 

Then he sent a soup emoji. 

His phone did nothing for what felt like an eternity.  
Nervously he sipped on his lemonade. 

He glanced over at Molly. She smiled back encouragingly, while she cleaned a table.  
Then he opened YouTube for a moment. He stared at the subscription page.  
Not long and he would have gained as many followers as Kevin.  
This couldn't be true. This couldn't be real. 

Then finally. 

Cmk: Alright, Punk. I declare war. 

Daniel made a high pitched squeaking sound and everyone turned and looked at him. 

Face in the colour of a tomato he paid and left the pub. 

He practically ran back to his flat.  
In his living room he walked up and down, unable to calm down.

RT: There is only one question I need to know. 

Cmk: what

RT: Can I call you Kevin?

Cmk: of course you can call me Kevi

RT: Alright, Kevi <3 

Kevi<3 : oh fleck. Autocorrect. 

RT: *Soup Emoji*

Kevi<3: Listen here, you little shit. XD You may have found my weak spot, but just you wait, until I find yours. 

RT: I don't have a weak spot. 

There were butterflies in his stomach.  
Actual butterflies. How could this happen? 

Daniel felt happy. This was an unusual feeling. Being surrounded by dead people on a day to day basis wasn't exactly very serotonin - giving. 

For the next few weeks they sent each other random memes without explanation or context whatsoever. 

And it seemed like every day their subscriber counts got closer. 

______

One day Kevin made a video, in which he sang 'country roads'.  
Daniel watched it several times. His voice was beautiful. The voice of an angel. And Daniel knew some actual angels personally. He didn't quite like most of them because they were really vain and stupid. But Kevin. Kevin had a voice that could make stones cry and flowers grow.  
Maybe it could even bring the dead back to life. 

He had to put his phone aside for a moment to collect his thoughts.

He ignored George, who looked weird at him again.

"Are you having a panic attack?", George asked.

"No, I don't."

"But you look like you have one."

Daniel tried to calm himself. He ran into the bathroom and splashed a bit of cold water into his face.  
Sometimes you just look in the mirror and you know something isn't right.  
His reflection stared back.  
Maybe it *wasn't* not right.  
Maybe it was just different.

Something had changed. He felt like birds were singing in the place, where in a real persons heart would pound. 

The way he felt about Kevin was different now.  
He wasn't just the famous handsome Kevin anymore.  
He was a real person to him. 

And that changed everything. 

He talked to Molly about it the next day and told her everything he felt for Kevin, at night after most of the guests were already gone.

Molly nodded. Then she said nothing for a while.

"Maybe you need to take a step back, honey.", she finally said.

"I'd really like to be ...friends with him."

"You have to draw the line somewhere between a little boys crush and an unhealthy obsession."

"That makes sense."

"Be careful with the internet, though. I heard something called a 'virus' is going around now."

"I will. And thank you for the advice and for listening."

"Anytime, sweetheart.", Molly said. And soon after that conversation, Dan went home.

He still watched every video but he shut down two of the fan accounts. He also tuned down the commenting. 

But now the tables had turned and Kevin started to comment on his stuff.  
They wrote tweets now and then and sometimes private messages.  
He realised that Kevin somehow had grown close to him.  
Dan started to feel like he seriously cared. On a different level than he cared for Molly or for past good friends.  
And that was new. When you collect souls each and every day, you have to learn to distance yourself from humans, because sooner or later you meet them for the last time.  
He was well aware of the fact that humans had just a limited amount of time. And knowledge made him uncomfortable whenever he remembered it.

He re watched the video.

Did it mean that he and Kevin were now friends?

He wished he wasn't this far away.

_______

Dan answered with the dance video.  
Kevin wanted to play a game, didn't he?  
If he wanted war, he could have a war. 

"How are you doing today, my dear boy?", Molly asked. "Have you eaten? You look particularly thin today. Have some garlic bread on the house, sweetheart."

"Thank you very much, Molly. I-" 

*I have collected the souls of an eighty two year old who had cold that could have been cured if his grandchildren had taken better care of him, a soul of a four year old and a thirty six year old that could have been prevented if a forty year old had stayed away from the devil's drink, and the soul of a twenty two year old that just couldn't live with a broken heart. It had been a bad day and I'm exhausted. And I'm so tired of human kind. *

"I think my dishwasher is broken.", he said instead.

"I can have a look at your dishwasher.", Molly said. 

"Oh, this would be very kind of you." 

"It's no problem at all. Do you need to get up early for uni tomorrow? I could come over, right after my shift." 

"No. Today is perfect. I have nothing planned for tomorrow." 

Dan waited for her to close the pub then they walked together to the apartment. He was glad he didn't have to make things up about his English major, because she kept talking about her daughter, who was expecting her first child and how they kept the baby room in green colours. First she hadn't liked that they had broken the tradition of painting the room either pink or blue but then she had seen that painting the room green, was the most Irish thing they could have done. And she told him how much she missed her children and hoped she could be back in Ireland in time for the birth of the baby.  
He nodded politely. And then he opened the door. 

"What is that?", she asked as they entered the living room. 

"This is the boy I like. I told you about him. Kevin." 

"This is a shrine.", Molly said, her voice shaking. 

"Then it is a shrine. Isn't he the most perfect human?" 

"Daniel James Condren. You are going to calm down immediately and build a healthy relationship with this young man." 

"My middle name is not-" 

"You are going to put this in a box right now and then you are going to call him and have a serious conversation about your feelings and you will stop this unhealthy behaviour." 

"Yes, Ma'am." 

While Molly fixed the dishwasher, Daniel put the photos and candles and figurines in a box. 

He didn't know why exactly he did it. But he took Mollys advice seriously. 

"Told you.", George said quietly, so Molly wouldn't hear him.

"It's an ancient tradition.", Daniel whispered back. 

"It's, as the youths say, creepy.", George said. 

Daniel bit his lips.  
Then he heard Molly approach them and they went quiet.  
Molly leaned down to pet George but the cat-like creature of darkness hid under the kitchen table.

She took a deep breath  
"Your dishwasher is fixed.  
But. Listen, young man. You should call this Kevin and tell him how you feel. Trust me, this will be better than staring at a wall of photos of him for hours.", Molly said. 

"It's not for hours.", he said. 

"You boys should talk to each other. I know, talking is hard, but it will help. Ok?"

"Ok."

She gave him a big motherly hug before she went to the door. 

"I know it's hard living alone in a different country. But you don't have to be alone-alone." 

"Thank you, Molly." 

After he closed the door behind her, he sat down on the couch. She was right. Of course she was. A human at that stage in life had had enough time to collect necessary social skills. 

With shaky hands he took the phone.  
Why was this so hard?  
He had been roaming the earth for six thousand years. He should be able to make a stupid phone call.  
So he took a deep breath, then he called the number. When Kevin took the call, Dan hung up. When Kevin called him back, he dropped the phone.  
Then he finally picked it up and tried to sound very cool and casual. 

"Hey." 

"Hey." 

"What's up?", Kevin asked after a pause. 

"Not much. You?" 

"Same hat.... Have you seen the ummmm new trailer of... The.... Thing?" 

"Oh yeah. It was  
... Great. I should totally watch it." 

"You should." 

Another pause. 

"So what do you do, when you don't play video games or admire your favourite and the by far superior 2Million subscriber YouTuber Call me Kevin?" 

*I collect the souls of the dead, but I also had a shrine with pictures of you and sometimes I write stories in which we hold hands. *

"I like reading." 

"What's your favourite book, RT?" 

"Catcher in the Rye." 

"I know that one. Moody teen complains a lot. Also he has a red hat." 

He hadn't read the book. But he had looked it up, when Dan had mentioned it in one of his videos in the hope he'd be able to impress him one day. 

"And what's your favourite book? I know you didn't go to school much, so-" 

"You are correct. It is the hungry caterpillar. But I haven't read it to the end yet, so no spoilers, please." 

They laughed. They laughed and the caterpillars in his stomach morphed to beautiful butterflies. If he would hiccup right now they would just escape his stomach and fly away. 

"What is your real name? ", Kevin asked after another, but much more comfortable, pause. 

"I'm Daniel." 

"That's not a real name." 

"What?" 

"I don't think your real name is Daniel either." 

"Of course it is." 

"OK then. Hi, Daniel. You can call me Kevin." 

He practically heard him winking through the phone.  
Dan laughed again. 

"Hi, Kevin." 

"Now that we have exchanged our names, I'm affraid I have to go and finish editing tonight's video. Are you gonna watch it?" 

"Maybe..."  
He tried to sound bored but he didn't quite succeed.

"I'll watch yours, too. But only so you won't feel sad.", Kevin said and he sounded like he was smiling.

"That's very kind of you. I hope you'll have a lovely evening. But since you are watching my video, I know your evening will be awesome."

"Same goes to you but more of it because I still have more subscribers. Talk to you soon." 

"Bye."

There was this warm feeling in his chest and he couldn't stop smiling.  
He hadn't told him how he felt. But it hadn't been necessary.  
He hugged the phone, dreaming the distance away until he noticed that George was watching him.  
It was hard to read the expression of the cat-like creature of darkness, but he didn't seem too happy.

______

The next day, Daniel sat down in the pub again with a wide grin. 

"How did it go, sweetheart?", Molly asked as soon as she could, ignoring some half drunk tourists.

"It went most excellently." 

"That's awesome, sweetie. What did you talk about?"

"I didn't exactly told him how I feel. But. He insulted my favourite book and now I know my soul belongs to him. One day we will meet. Thank you for your help." 

"I'm so proud of you.", Molly said. 

And Dan beamed at her. 

______

Then there was another singing video. 

This time it was 'ring of fire'. 

His voice was-  
Dan listened to it again and again before he read the comments. 

But before he could leave his own comment, he got the notification that a terrible car accident had happened.  
*Not now*  
*please*  
But it couldn't wait.  
With a sigh he stopped time and went to Sapporo. 

The scene was horrifying.  
But not far away from where he had to collect souls between blood and tears, there was the snow festival.  
He had read a lot about it, but he hadn't taken the time to go there, yet.  
But now he could as well just have a look.

So much beauty so close to so much pain.  
He walked between the statues and admired their beauty.  
George followed him. These days he was wearing a little bell on a red collar around his neck.  
The ringing of the bell reminded him of angels. And angels reminded him of Kevin. 

"You are distracted.", George said. 

He watched the frozen snowflakes glitter in the sunlight. "I'm not."

"What are you then?", George asked tiredly. 

Dan bit his lips.  
He acted like he hadn't understood the question. In his head he heard Kevin's voice singing ring of fire.

"Stop goofing around.", George said. 

"I'm not.", Dan emphasized.

"You know what usually happens when gods fall for mortals." 

"I have absolutely no idea what you are talking about." 

"You know exactly what I'm talking about." 

They walked in silence for a while, moving with soundless steps.

"It doesn't have to be this way.", Daniel said quietly.

He knew if they ever had a night together, he would have to sneak out sooner or later to do his work.  
At least once a day he had to collect the souls of the dead in the country he was currently in. He could make that work.  
But then there were the days when there were emergencies like really bad car accidents, when he had to get there immediately. 

It was harder to collect the souls of those who were not prepared to die.  
Could anyone ever be prepared to die? The answer was that at least some were more prepared than others. 

"You never have and you shouldn't. What will you do, when he starts to get old and you are still trapped in this immortal vessel?", George stood in his way.

"We'll cross the river when we come to the bridge."  
Dan walked around him.

"You can't be serious." 

"Six thousand years is a long time."  
He ran his fingers over the scales of the icy dragon figure.  
One good thing about being able to stop time was that he could touch stuff without people yelling at him. 

"Eternity is a long time. 6000 years is not.", George said.

"Depending on if he would ever chose to be with me, I would find a way." 

And with that the conversation was over. 

_____

A few days later he got another notification, that needed his immediate attention.

Like so many people he hated hospitals. Of course a lot of people could get out there alive. But some people didn't.

Dan stood in front of one of the beds for longer than he should, next to crying parents, frozen in time.  
Fuck. 

Not that it mattered, as long as time was stopped.  
He went through the records longer than he was supposed to. He read files, looked around the room.  
The child had needed a heart transplant.

Life was shit and that was the truth. 

He picked up the soul and put it gently in the bag. 

After all those years it still hurt him. 

But this was his job and no one else could do it. Ok. Maybe there was someone else who could do it. But on the other hand it was the entire point of his existence. It was his bloody purpose.

When he came home, his mortal vessel still felt sick. 

"Get yourself together.", George said.  
It sounded merciless. But it also grounded him a bit.

"These are the moments when I really long for someone to hold me." 

Dan stared out of the window with a sad expression. And both of them knew, what he thought about.

George sighed.  
"I know you are thinking about it. Just write to him, already."  
And with that he disappeared into the other room.

Daniel got out his phone. There were some Twitter and Instagram notifications which he ignored. He bit his lip. And then he just started writing.

RT: hey

There was no answer for a long time.  
He regreted that turning time backwards wasn't one of his abilities. 

He had almost come to the point when he just turned off the phone, but then it finally beeped.

Kevi<3: hey what up? 

What now? He hadn't thought he would come to that point. 

RT: how was your day? 

Kevi<3: the usual. Filmed a video. Ate some dry pizza.  
How was yours? 

RT: mine was absolutely shit

Kevi<3: wanna talk about it? 

It took him quite a lot of time to formulate an elaborate answer regarding what he felt inside.  
Then he deleted it.

RT: no

Kevi<3: then let's talk about something else. What do you think about the Election? 

For some reason this made Dan laugh out loud. 

RT: I don't think there is any right now. 

Then Kevin typed for a while. Dan wondered if he was typing a really long message or if he was just typing and deleting.  
Was he as nervous as he was?  
Finally the phone beeped.

Kevi<3: I don't know why you think I would be good at cheering people up. I never made anyone laugh in my entire life.  
Baby's always cry when they see me.  
But here. Look at this goose, who is friends with a cat.  
*sends meme*  
*sends meme*  
*sends meme*

A smile flickered across Dans face.

Kevi<3: *sends meme*  
*sends meme*  
*sends meme*

He giggled.

Kevi<3: *sends meme*  
*sends meme*  
*sends meme*  
Better?

RT: not quite yet.

Kevi<3: *sends meme*  
*sends meme*  
*sends meme*

RT: Thank you. I feel better now.

Kevi<3: no problem, Dan. RT. What is your favourite food, by the way?

RT: idk. Cupcakes?

Kevi<3: Alright. I gotta go now. I'll talk to you later, cupcake. Xoxo

And this made him so strangely happy.

______

Weeks went by and Dan danced a second time. 

He danced just for him. 

Careless whisper started playing. And he knew it should be their song. 

"I love you, invisible men, that's standing there."  
He imagined Kevin being there. The viewers knew that he imagined Kevin standing there.  
Maybe even Kevin knew that he imagined Kevin standing there. 

But did the invisible man love him back?  
And if the answer to that question was actually 'yes', how would a long distance relationship work?  
Were they already having one?  
Daniel was too much of a coward to ask. 

"Waiting for Kevin to dance Careless whisper with me. I need someone for the piggy back ride.", he said, acting like he was out of breath. 

He ignored the horny comments. 

Everyone looked hot in a suit.  
Same for glasses, suit of armor, blood of your enemies and turtlenecks. 

In the far back of his conscience, he wondered if Kevin would as well think that he looked good? Was that even possible?  
But there was probably no chance to find out anyway. 

______

Kevin called him a few days later and Dans heart did the jumpy thing again.  
"Hey listen.  
I got an invitation to ... It's pretty lame, actually.  
It's a party and there'll be lot of gaming."

"Sounds fun."

"Maybe it wouldn't be as terrible if you came with me."

"You want me to come to Ireland just like that?"

"Is it weird that I asked that? I shouldn't have asked."

"It's ok. Actually I've been thinking about coming back. A lot."

"So you are considering it?"

"I'd love to. -

He stopped.

"Please don't say 'but'.", Kevin said.

"-But I can't. I can't just hop on a plane for you and-. Maybe at a later time. My friend Molly wants to come back to Ireland, too. Soon to-"

"I understand."

"Thank you for asking, I'd-"

He heard the beep tone.

"Kevin.", Dan said and only the beeping answered.

"Why did you say 'no'?", George asked.

"It's complicated. I can't just switch places with the current Ireland shinigami and everything is fine."

"Technically you can."

"Why are you even asking? I thought you don't want us to be together?"

"I don't. But I'm curious.", George said.

Dan started to walk up and down in front of the sofa.  
"I'm scared.", he finally said.

"Why."

"I'm scared of ... Him."

"Him?"

"I don't want to give him the power to hurt me. But also I want to be special to him."

"Are you saying, that you are scared that you could be just another guy to him?"

"Maybe."

"Interesting. So you are scared to go there and get your feelings hurt. Those which you shouldn't have in the first place."

"They are real."

"Nothing is ever 'real'."  
George laughed dryly.

Dan threw his phone in a corner of the room. It shattered on the wall.

"Oh. So now we are having a temper tantrum.", George said.

"Shut up."

Dan sat down on the floor and hid his face.  
The floor was cold and dusty.

"You are acting like a child. Have a little bit of self respect.", George said.

With a hand-wave Dan fixed the broken pieces.

"This is stupid. You are stupid."  
Dan picked up the phone and disappeared into his bedroom, shutting the door with a bang behind him.

As he lay on the bed and hugged his pillow, he imagined how it would be to just pack everything and leave. Close the door and never come back.  
He imagined how Kevin would wait for him at the airport.  
How they would hug and kiss, when they finally met.  
What would it be like to kiss him?  
What would Kevin's hair feel like?  
Would he really be that tall?  
Maybe he was never going to find out.  
He opened YouTube on his phone.

"Hello, friends. How is it going? My name is-"

_________

It must have been the middle of the night in Ireland, when Dans phone started ringing and the video stopped.  
Should he answer it or should he leave it be?

He stared at Kevin's name on the display.  
It stopped ringing.  
Fuck.

Then it started ringing again.

"Hey.", Dan said, quietly.

"I wanted to say sorry for hanging up.", Kevin said. His voice sounded different than usual. Dan waited for him to make a joke. But he didn't.  
The silence was awful.

"It's fine.", Dan said softly.

"So I guess I won't go then."

"You are being childish. You should go and have some fun."  
He hoped George wouldn't hear him saying that.

"It won't be any fun if I go alone."

"I'm sorry to hear that."

"We could video chat instead that day. Drink some Guinness together. Light a candle."

"I don't want to keep you from meeting new people."

"I know enough people."  
He sounded very stubborn.

This made Dan smile again.  
"Ok. So it's a date."

Then his smile dropped again when he realised what he just had said. He didn't know why he said that. Now he couldn't delete it anymore. This was the stupid thing about talking on the phone. He couldn't take stuff back.

But Kevin chuckled. "It's a date. See you in twelve weeks and four days. ... How about 8 o'clock?"

"...8 is fine. But we will video chat in between. Won't we?"

"Let me check my calendar. -I've got a whole bunch of nothing to do. I guess I can find some time for you, too. We can do that."

"Ok."

Dan smiled at the phone.  
He imagined Kevin smiling back.

There was a pause.

"Anyway. Have you tried the new Sims4 pack?"

And they talked until Kevin fell asleep on the phone.

_______

Two days later Kevin called him again.

"Hey, what's up.", Dan said cheerfully.

"Hey.", Kevin replied.  
Then he went quiet again.

"Is something wrong?", Dan asked.  
For a moment he was really scared.

Another pause.

"Tell me more about Molly.", Kevin said quietly. "It's been keeping me- I'm sorry. You can do whatever you want, but-."  
He sighed.

*whatever was that supposed to mean?*

Dan waited a moment, then he said: "Molly is great. She is the best. She fixed my dishwasher and she makes the best lemonade I've drank in centuries. When she's got the money together, she will come back to Ireland to visit her grandchildren."

"Sounds great. -Wait. How old is she?"

"Late fifties? I don't know. I'm not good with age."

"So you are normal friends?"

"Yes, we are. Why are you asking?"

"I just thought it would be weird with the age gap. But I'm glad to hear that you are single."

"I am. Idiot. But. ...Would a huge age gap be a problem for you?"

"Huge?"

"Huge."

"I never thought about that."

"Think about it now."

"Um. Did you lie about your age? If you are younger than twenty, I wouldn't-"

"I'm not younger than twenty."

"Good."

Kevin sounded pleased and Dan hesitated.

"...how about older?", he asked carefully.

"I seriously don't know how to answer that. Are you a seventy year old ex convict?"

"No. I'm not a seventy year old ex convict..." Dan didn't want to lie. Technically he'd been to prison before, when he unfroze time at a bad moment before leaving a crime scene. But that's already been like two hundred years ago.  
And it only happened once.  
Maybe twice.

"Then it's fine.", Kevin said.

"Really?"  
He tried not to sound too hopeful.  
He failed.

"Yeah. The bar gets lower every year I'm single."

"We could change that."

"You want to be my boyfriend? The answer is yes. Of course you can be my boyfriend."

"I meant setting your standards higher but I like your idea better."

"Then we are now in a long distance relationship.", Kevin said quickly, so Dan wouldn't have time to change his mind.

"I'll change my Facebook status right now.", Dan said with a laugh.

"Fecking boomer.", Kevin said softly.

Then Dan took a deep breath. He needed to know. Really know. "...Are we just jokingly in a relationship or are we really in a relationship. -I need to know."

There was silence for a moment on the other end and Dan was terrified to hear Kevin laugh.

"A real one. Unless you are joking. Then I'm joking, too."

*This couldn't be true. Could it?*  
"I'm not joking. I really like you."

"I really like you, too.", Kevin said and Dan wished he could be with him right then so badly it hurt.

"Kevin?"

"Yes, Cupcake?"

"I miss you."

"I miss you, too."

And it was an awful thing to miss someone who never left.

________

Days went by and they called each other every day.

Kevin called him at the oddest of times.  
But it was always nice to hear his voice.  
Dan would have preferred to have some sort of routine, but he got, that Kevin was just too chaotic for that.  
At least he could still watch his videos always at the same time, like a ritual.  
He had always like rituals.

"Hey. How's it going?", Dan asked one time.

"Hey. Good. And you? What are you doing right now?"

"I...uh..."

*am just getting back from a crime scene. Triple homicide. The murderer got away with it.*

"I'm making a toast right now. -Also I was just thinking of you."

"What are you wearing?", Kevin asked.

"Just my suit soaked in blood."

He froze.  
*ooops.*

But Kevin just laughed excitedly.

"I imagine you look fecking good right now. How about you get out of your suit and wash it? But do it slowly?", he asked.

"I can still wear it like that. It's a bit uncomfortable and a bit wet, but I have nothing to change into right now and-"

"Wait. Why is your suit soaked in blood again?"

"I just slipped in a puddle of blood."

Kevin probably realised at this point, that Dan needed a little help with this.  
"HHmm. Ok. ...how about I get out of my clothes instead?", Kevin asked.

"Don't catch a cold. I read on the internet there should be snow soon in Ireland."

"Ok, dad.", Kevin said, sounding very disappointed.

"Don't call me dad. I'm just worried about you. I got my first ever boyfriend and I don't want him to die of the common cold."

"I could call you daddy instead.", Kevin mused, ignoring the last part of what Dan had said.

"... Kevin."

"You like that, don't you?"

"No, I don't."  
Yes, he did.

"...Alright, you should eat your toast before it gets cold. I'll talk to you later, cupcake."

*no, call me daddy.*

"Yeah, we'll talk later ...and Kevin?"

"Yes?"

"I miss you."

"I miss you, too."

He hung up and then he frowned at his phone.

How could you miss someone you never met?

The literal definition of missing someone is 'to perceive with regret the absence or loss of that person in your life'. But the emotional impact of missing someone is much more complex than just the feeling of losing something.  
Losing a pen happens all the time.  
Losing one shoe can be quite painful.  
Or losing a body part.  
But losing a person is entirely different.

When a person or entity misses another person or entity in their life, it is typically attributed to the fact that they love them.

There it was again. The fact that it somehow happened that he had fallen in love, because emotionally, missing someone is one of the many expressions of love.

On the other hand the psychological factors behind missing someone are also important. A person or entity who is lonely and sees a world where other people or entities are sharing and loving each other, can find themselves missing someone because they are not feeling any love in their life.  
But he did feel love.  
Didn't he?

He felt at least some kind of love for Kevin and he missed him, because he wasn't by his side.  
And he belonged by his side.  
He did.

______

Their first video call date was on a Tuesday a week later.  
Dan found the thought comforting, that they already had agreed on a second one, even if it was more than a month later.

Dan put the laptop on the kitchen table, lit a candle, filled a glass with lemonade and sat in front of the laptop.

"You look even more handsome on Skype than you do on YouTube.", was the first thing Kevin said, when the call started.

"Thank you. Same goes to you."

Dan was wearing his usual suit and Kevin wore a grey suit, Dan recalled he had worn in one of his James Bond videos.

In front of Kevin was a glass with Guiness and a red flower. Behind him was his green screen and Dan was a tiny bit disappointed because he had hoped to see more of his flat and grasp another look of Kevin 'behind' the camera.

"What are you drinking? I don't want to pressure you into alcoholism, though. I'm just curious.", Kevin said, before taking a sip of his glass.

"Just some lemonade. George will get really mad, if I start drinking again."

"Who is George?"  
There was this pinch of jealousy in his voice again.  
Dan hid a smile by taking another sip of his lemonade.

"No one.", he said, hoping to sound mysterious.

Kevin suddenly looked very sad.

"Actually he is quite annoying, because he leaves hair everywhere in the flat and sometimes he just storms into my bedroom and yells at me in the middle of the night."

"What an asshole."

"That's just classic George. A real monster. But most of the time he just looks like a cat."

"George is a cat?"

"At least he looks like one. Smol. Fluffy. Four paws."

Dan had to laugh at how relieved Kevin looked.  
They would have to do something about the jealousy thing, said the reasonable part of him. The other part just really liked that Kevin seemed to feel about him this way.  
Dan took another small sip.

Kevin got closer to the camera. "What would you do if there wasn't an Air line of 5,957.91 mi or 9,588.33 km between us, which means the Driving route would be 8,868.68 mi or 14,272.76 km which equals 211h 50min?", Kevin read from his hand.

Dan got closer to the camera as well and opened the first button of his shirt seductively. "If we were next to each other right now, I would -" he licked his lips. "I would take your hand and go on a nice walk with you. We would walk slowly and chat about nothing important and it would be a nice and sunny day.  
Maybe we would illegally feed some pigeons. After that we would go eat some pizza and have a small argument about toppings and you would make an inappropriate joke. We would laugh and then we would feed each other desserts.  
We would walk a little more until it would start to get a little chilly and I would give you my jacket and it would be much too small for you.  
And then we would still hold hands while watching the sunset.  
I would bring you to your doorstep and I would kiss you good night in the light of the moon and the stars on the cloudless sky.  
Maybe you would ask me to come inside and first I would decline, but-"

"I would just fecking ask you again- and you would say 'no' again. I would ask you, when I could see you again and we would agree to go on a second date, as soon as possible. From my doorstep I would watch you leave and I would already miss you. But it would have been one of my best days ever. And I would never forget it."  
Kevin smiled, but he looked sad.  
He didn't want him to look sad.

"I would never forget it either.", Dan answered softly.

They just looked at each other for a while, then Kevin's expression changed again.  
"But after the third date I'd fecking tie you to the bed with the Wii remote control wrist straps and make sure the neighbours can't look us in the eyes ever again."

There was a pause and Dan bit his lips.  
"I wish I could just reach through the screen and hold your hand right now.", he said.

"I bet after enough Guinness I can do that.", Kevin said, which made him laugh again.

Then they talked for a while about their channels and some YouTube gossip.  
It was nice.  
It felt natural.  
It felt like it was supposed to be.

"We should do that again soon.", Kevin said after he had emptied his fifth glass.

"We should.", Dan said and sighed, because he didn't want to say goodbye yet. But a glance at the clock told him, that Kevin probably needed some sleep.

"I already miss you.", Dan said softly.

"I miss you, too."

_________

Two days later George saw light under Dans door at a time he usually rested.  
He entered the room without a sound and saw Dan lieing on his stomach, staring at his phone, stubbornly.

"What are you reading?", he asked.

"69 tips on how to make a long distance relationship work.", Dan answered. He sounded angry.

"Nice."

"No, it's not. Most of them are really shitty."

"Why are you reading them then?"

"I don't know. Mostly to get angry, I suppose. Look at number 39 'get a good messaging app' or number 12 'be grateful' or number 60 'enjoy your time with friends and family'."

"Seems like someone really desperately tried to get the 69 full."

Dan groaned loudly and turned to lie on his back. The screen of his phone illuminated his face in the dark room.  
"Actually. There is one tip I like. 'Send them pictures and videos'."  
Dan looked up from his phone and saw yellowish glowing eyes staring back.  
"Should I send him a picture?", Dan asked.

"Why are you asking me?"

"I was asking myself."

"Not weird at all."

"But a picture of what? Of myself?"

"Are you sure you want a picture like that on the internet?"

"Get your mind out of the gutter! I wasn't talking about a picture like that. Also it doesn't specify here so I'd assume any picture is fine."

"Yes. Sure. Of course you weren't thinking about it at all. I can't leave you alone anymore for one minute, can I?"

Dan took a photo of George before he could blink.

"Look at my silly cat.", he said out loud while he typed.

"Stop it.", George said angrily.

"Aww. He sent a heart emoji.", Dan said, without looking up from his phone. He giggled. Then he typed something.

"This was very rude of you."

"I'm answering with a soup emoji."  
Then the phone rang and he let it ring two times before he picked up.

"Hey. What's up?"

....

"Yes, I was just thinking about you."

George left the room with a huff.  
He didn't like where this was going.  
He had been Dans most important friend for the last few centuries. And how could it have happened, that his master had fallen for a human? And then even for someone like that?  
He could have had someone... Someone different!

But.  
On the other hand.  
Dan seemed happy.  
He couldn't remember if he had ever seen him that happy before.  
Dan smiled more often and sometimes he sang quietly to himself. He had caught him dancing through the kitchen with an invisible partner more than once.  
But was that Kevin guy really good for him? Wouldn't he make him vulnerable after all?  
From the bedroom he heard Dan laugh.

George decided that it wasn't his decision to make.  
With a grunt he stretched out underneath the living room window and let his fur soak in the light of the full moon.

_________

About two days later there came a package with the post.

It was a package that had come all the way from Ireland, he found out after further inspecting it.

He opened it carefully.

Inside was a framed Jim Pickens picture and on the back was a note.

"To my biggest fan. From the 2.2Million subscriber Youtuber to the less subscriber YouTuber Rt."

Underneath he had drawn a few hearts.

And underneath that there was written:

"Hope to soon have a special meet and greet with my biggest fan ;)

I miss you, Dan.  
I really do."

He didn't know how to feel.  
Dan called him.  
"You complete fecker.", Dan said before Kevin could say anything.

"So you got my little message."

"Yes I did. George is sitting in the box right now."

"What do you think about a meet and greet with your favourite YouTuber? I might be able to get you some VIP tickets, that let you go straight to my-"

There was a car honking outside. Then a police car with a siren drove past.

"I don't know if it is a good idea to just leave everything behind and...", Dan said reluctantly.

"How about I visit you instead?"

Dan didn't answer.  
It would be difficult to really 'be' with him. Kevin would find out what he was. He would ask questions. He would judge him. He would find out. He would be scared. He would leave him for lying. He would leave him for telling the truth.  
He would leave him for *not* telling the truth.  
He would leave him.

"Dan, are you still there?"

Dan felt that his face was wet. Why was his face wet?

"Kevin, I -I need more time to sort things out ok?"

"Ok. But-"

"Please don't ask questions."

"I won't. But you have to promise-"

"I promise."

"-the VIP thing. Ok, I won't ask questions."

"Believe me, I do want to meet you. But not yet."

"It's ok. You sound upset. Please don't be upset. Everything is fine. Look I'm sending you a picture of a parakeet sitting on a turtle."

"Thank you.  
I miss you."

"I miss you, too."

__________

They talked to each other on the phone a few more times. Not every day, though. He had read that it was important not to constantly hang on the phone with each other. That was one of the points he had liked the least.  
But he would send photos. Sometimes of the sunset, sometimes of a pretty bird or a flower.

And one day. There came a single text message from Kevin, that surprised him a little.

Kevi<3 : Hey Daniel, if that even is your real name. I made another video. And I think you should know, that this one is for you. 

He refreshed his dash. Then he clicked on Kevin's newest video.  
There he was.  
With that smile.  
And an ukulele. 

"Wise men say-" 

Dan paused the video to collect his thoughts.  
He was in love.  
He was in love with a mortal. Truly and madly in love and nothing was going to stop him. Least of all Georges disapproving glance.

"Oh, shut up.", he said before the cat-like creature of darkness could say something.

Then his phone beeped again.

Kevi<3 : Also I'd like to inform you that I found your weak spot, cupcake.  
Its me.  
I'm the weak spot. 

With shaky fingers, Dan called him. 

"Hey." 

"Hey." 

Then they were quiet for a long time. 

He wasn't in any position to form coherent sentences. Neither of them was. It practically had been a confession. The next logical step was to be brave but how to be brave when Dan had never in six thousand years done anything even slightly bit risky?  
They listened to each other breathing and Daniel imagined what it would be like to sit next to each other and have a conversation. Maybe hold hands.  
They still were quiet, until he heard Kevin sigh. 

"Please come home.", Kevin said.

Something inside of Daniels chest started aching. 

"If you can't come here I will come to you. I really just want you to be really with me. I'll buy a ticket, catch the next flight and I'll be on your doorstep before dawn."

"No, stay where you are. I'll come home."

"Are you sure?"

"I will.", Dan said. "I will come home to you."

"Good." 

"I'm packing my things and I'll take the next flight back to Ireland." 

"I will be there waiting for you." 

Shortly after he hung up, he called the current shinigami of Ireland and asked to switch places. The other one was most happy to do so. 

_______

Soon he stood in front of his packed suitcases and he was a little bit bummed out that six thousand years fitted into two suitcases and the traveling box for his cat-like creature of darkness. He also had a bag with something to read and snacks.

Kevin had insisted on paying the ticket for him and Daniel didn't have the heart to tell him that it would be a lot easier for him to take the short cut through the nine circles of hell. 

He got sick on the plane a few times.  
Breathing in his human form was agony.  
He hated flying.  
George in his travel box was going to be so mad at him.  
Since Kevin paid for his ticket, Dan could help out Molly with hers.  
But on the plane she wasn't a lot of help to him. She had held his hand at the start for a bit and calmed him down with storys about her kids for a while but then she'd just fallen asleep and Dan was alone with his thoughts.  
At least no one died on the plane.  
Molly snored lightly and outside the window he could see a few lights. Then he had to leave his seat again.

Finally and after hours of pure pain he was on the ground again and swore to himself to never set foot in a plane again. 

Dan got the suitcases and George with last bit of his strength.  
Molly got her suitcases earlier than him and said her goodbyes before disappearing in the crowd, but not before not inviting him over for some time.

Dan thanked her for everything.

Then it was finally time.  
Just through the doors and-

_________

There he was.  
In a leather jacket and with a big smile and a box of cupcakes in all colours of the rainbow. And some flowers.  
Kevin. 

"Hey." 

"Hey." 

They stood in front of each other. 

Kevin was a lot taller than he had expected.  
What should he do now?  
They looked into each other eyes quietly.

Then Kevin took the last step and wrapped his arms around him.  
The embrace was warm and soft.  
He actually felt save for once.

Dan closed his eyes and with every fiber of his being he felt like this was the perfect moment. He deeply inhaled it.

"May I?", Kevin asked in a raspy voice, so close to his ear, that he could feel his breath on his skin. 

"Yes." 

Kevin gently kissed his cheek. 

Then he took his hand and lead the way.  
They struggled with the suitcases and George for a bit. The fact that Dan felt like he had no strength left in his body made things a little bit difficult.  
Also they had to go by bus, because Kevin still had a problem with cars.  
They held hands on the bus. No one cared that they held hands. It was a long ride. Dan was too weak to talk much, but it was fine. He leaned against him and enjoyed his warmth. It was so unfamiliar, yet so strangely comforting.

Kevin had to fully carry him the last steps, when they arrived at his flat.

"Finally I get my Careless whisper piggyback ride.", Daniel said and Kevin started singing the lyrics while carrying him as careful as he could, so he wouldn't get sick again. 

Then Kevin went back to get the suitcases and George in his travel box. 

"I really need to shower.", Daniel said, when Kevin sat down next to him on the couch. 

"Should I help?" 

"I have showered before.", Daniel said in confusion. 

But Kevin didn't elaborate what he had on his mind. 

Freshly showered, Daniel fell asleep on the sofa for four hours, until he woke up and had to steal himself away to collect the souls of those who had died meanwhile. 

Ten natural causes. It had been a good day. 

When he came back, he brought fresh croissants for breakfast - one Baker had died- and made some tea for both of them until Kevin woke up. 

"Good morning, Cupcake.", Kevin said as he entered the kitchen. Then he wrapped his arms around Daniel from behind, while the other one was still searching for clean plates. 

"Good morning. Stop calling me cupcake."

"I call you cupcake, because you are so sweet I want to eat you."

"Ok, gross."

They laughed.

"You made breakfast.", Kevin stated.

"I did." 

"You are the perfect boyfriend." 

"I am." 

Kevin kissed his cheek, before putting his hands on his hips and gently pushing him to the side, so he could grab the plates, that Daniel was too short for to reach. 

"Oh, good morning, George.", Kevin said, as he put the plates on the table.

George ignored them.

"He's such a sweet cat."

Kevin picked him up from the ground and both, Dan and George looked at him, horrified.

"But he didn't use the cat toilet I specifically bought for him."

"He uhm...."

"Who is a stinky boi? I really hope you didn't pee in the sock drawer or something."

Dan and George exchanged a look.

"He wouldn't do that."

"Almost forgot. I also bought a little squeaky toy for you." Kevin got a squeaky chicken out of a drawer behind him and then leaned against the oven again.  
He held the squeaky toy in front of George expectantly.  
Dan held his breath.

George looked at the squeaky toy, then at Dan, then at the squeaky toy again.

*Come on*

The cat-like creature of darkness slowly bit into the chicken, his eyes saying *You'll pay for making me do this.*  
'Squeaaaaaaaak', said the chicken.

"Look, he loves it.", Kevin said happily.

Dan took George from Kevin's hands and sat him on the floor again.

'Squeaaaaaaaaak', said the chicken, as George stared at both of them before disappearing into the living room.

Dan had never heard anyone squeaking a toy chicken this passive-aggressively before.

"You don't have to wear your suit all day. Not that I'm complaining.", Kevin said and took a sip of the coffee Dan had made for him.

"I don't really have anything else to wear." 

"I can give you one of my shirts so we could get a little bit more comfortable."

And less than a minute later he was back and handed him a plain black shirt. Dan wasn't sure if it was the right thing to just change right there or go to the bathroom instead.  
Kevin was watching him. And when Dan started to unbutton the white shirt he was currently wearing, Kevin gave him a helping hand. Warm hands brushing over soft skin made them both giggle.  
Finally Dan stood on the tips of his toes and pulled Kevin's face towards him so he could kiss him. And he did. He tasted like warmth and coffee. He hadn't known that fireworks would feel like that. Kevin seemed somewhat surprised. But then Kevin picked him up and sat him on the kitchen table, so it would be easier with the height difference. 

When things got more interesting, suddenly Dans phone beeped which almost gave him a heart attack.  
*Not now. Please not now.*

Kevin stepped back and just looked at him. His cheeks were flushed and his hair was a mess and Dan hated that he had to leave. With a heavy heart he pushed Kevin away from him, slid from the table and got his suit back on. 

"I have to go, for a moment. I'll be right back." 

"Why?" 

*A horrible school bus accident. I really don't want to even think about it. I just want to get the job done and come home to you. But there is nothing I can do about this. *

"I don't want to talk about it. But I'll be back soon. OK? I promise." 

He gave him a last lingering kiss and then he left. 

Kevin picked up the black shirt from the floor, after he had watched him go.  
He was confused. What in the world could have happened?  
If it was a family emergency or something like that he could have just said just that and it wouldn't have been a problem at all.  
Things happen all the time.

He couldn't quite tell why, but Dans behaviour just rubbed him the wrong way.  
While he was alone, Kevin played something on the computer, but after the video was filmed, he didn't even remember what he had played.  
He probably had killed a lot of people or animals or both, though.

He sighed.

When Daniel came back, he still felt very cold and shaken. Children dying always got him. Still, after all these years.  
Fuck.

"What happened?", Kevin asked, worried.

"Please hold me.", Dan said. 

And Kevin did, without asking another question. 

He fell asleep on the sofa holding Dan who didn't cry but his sadness was so intense, that Kevin could feel it, too, radiating from him.

_______

"Hey, I thought we could make a video together. Our viewers would be absolutely fecking thrilled.", Kevin said after breakfast, the next morning.

"I'd like to do that. Yeah. Great idea. What game were you thinking of?" 

"I thought of 'to the moon'." 

"This sounds cute. Let me help you set everything up."

It didn't take a lot of time and soon they sat next to each other in front of the camera.

"Hello friends how is it going my name is Kevin and today we are doing something a little bit different. With me I got a special guest. You may know him as RT but I call him cupcake in bed."

"Don't say that on camera."

"I'm joking. The camera isn't even recording yet."

"Also we haven't-"

"We can change that."

They looked into each others eyes.

Then Dans phone beeped.

"I have to go. I'll be right back.", Dan said already standing up.

"Don't go." 

"I have to." 

"Dan..." 

Dan kissed his forehead before getting his jacket and leaving. 

Could you really trust someone, you met on the Internet?  
Could you ever really trust anyone? 

Kevin looked for George so at least he could give him company.  
But when he couldn't find him, he just started editing a video.  
Then he made a video alone, trying hard not to be too disappointed and sad on camera.

When Dan came back, Kevin was already asleep at the desk.

Dan carefully picked him up and brought him back to bed, without waking him.

It had been a really shitty day.  
He had to freeze and unfreeze time more often than was good for him and then he had to travel to several different places.  
Downstairs the guards were quite rude again and he had lost a lot of time arguing again.

He tried not to think about what he had seen, when he watched Kevin sleep.  
Then he thought that it might be creepy to just sit there and watch him sleep. So he went back to the living room and stared at the wall opposite of him for a while. 

______

The next day they decided to try and film another video together. Monster Prom 2 seemed like a good idea.

"Jacksepticeye voices a character there.", Kevin said.

"Our chance to finally date Jacksepticeye."

"He is Calculester Hewlett-Packard (v1.0) by the way. So look out for him."

"How could they name him Calculester and not ask Phil Lester to voice him?"

"Great. Now I wanna date Phil Lester instead."

"Oh no.", Dan said and they laughed.

"Funfact: I didn't go to prom, because I never really went to school." 

"I had to crash one once. But it was not my own." 

"What happened?" 

*Poisoned Punch*

"I uh. Wanted to wear a pretty dress for once in my life.", Dan said with a smirk.

"OK. Relatable." 

"There's another Youtuber I'd prefer dating over Jacksepticeye. And Phil Lester." 

"Damn you, danisnotonfire.", Kevin said, shaking a fist. 

"Turn off the camera.", Dan said suddenly.  
Underneath the table he had one hand on Kevin's leg.

"You know what would be even better than turning off the camera? Leaving it on.", Kevin said.

"No." 

They started kissing. First very gently, then more hungrily.  
It felt unlike everything he had ever felt before. 

Things started to get *really* interesting, but then Dan's phone went off. Again.

*oh FUCK*  
He wanted to throw it against a wall and make it explode.

"Oh shit, I have to go." 

"Where do you have to go?" 

*There's a burning building in Waterford. And I should go there. Many people died. This is the part of my job I hate the most. When innocent people die. *

"I have to.", he said avoiding eye contact. 

He stood up, but Kevin grabbed his wrist. 

"Daniel. Am I just a fecking side chick for you?"

He wanted to laugh but then he saw the hurt in his eyes.  
Dan felt his heartbeat increasing.

*Now or never*

"Do you love me, Kevin?" 

"Yes, I do.", he said immediately without even thinking about it. 

"OK." 

Dan leaned over and kissed him and everything faded to black and white and only their hearts were glimmering in a red and pink light. 

"Then I'm going to show you.", Dan said while Kevin gasped for air. 

They held hands, when the walls melted. And after Kevin blinked, he stood in the middle of a street with Daniel. In front of them was a burning building. Although. It wasn't exactly burning. There were flames, but they weren't moving. They were surrounded by firefighters and paramedics. But everything was still and nothing moved. 

Even the flames were frozen.  
Kevin reached for them, as they entered the building, but he felt nothing. They were just like still air. Not warm not cold. Just there.  
Meanwhile Daniel had started his work. He collected the souls of those who had died. Kevin quietly followed him through the building. Daniel picked up small things that looked like glowing wilted flowers and put them into a bag. There were many flowers but the bag didn't seem to grow any heavier.  
Kevin tried not to look at the burned faces. Not even their steps made a sound.  
He only looked at Daniel.  
Daniel in his suit that seemed so out of place and at the same time he looked like he belonged there.  
Daniel who smiled like nothing bad could ever happen.  
Daniel who could kiss him in a way that could make him forget anything. 

"When I started following a hot guy on YouTube this fecking happening was the last thing I would have fecking expected. Feck.", he said. He didn't sound angry.  
Just confused.  
Flames surrounded them in a circle, but it was frozen.

"Does it change anything?"  
Daniel turned around and looked him in the eyes. The bag was hanging loosely from his shoulders. His hair was ruffled and the first buttons of his shirt were open and he could see white skin behind the almost equally white shirt. 

Kevin took two steps forward and grabbed his face with both hands and kissed him. 

"No. It doesn't change anything." 

The shock made Dan unfreeze time.  
Kevin really did love him and-  
Kevin screamed as they stood in the middle of a burning ring of fire.

Dan refroze time. 

"Holy feck."

"Holy feck indeed."

"You look good with all that fire around you.", Kevin said a little out of breath.

"I love you.", Dan said as they stood in the burning building, surrounded by the frozen flames.  
And corpses.

"I love you, too.", Kevin said. 

_______

"Are we not going to talk about the fact, that you are the grim reaper?", Kevin asked and scratched his hair. There was a bit of ashes in there. An uncomfortable reminder that it had been real. That *this* had really happened.

"I prefer the Japanese name shinigami. But yeah. If you wanna talk, I'm right here."

They sat down at home on the couch together. Kevin opened his mouth a few times like a fish, but nothing happened.

"You don't have to be scared of me. Just ask me anything.", Dan said softly. He took his hand.

"You are a literal god of death." , Kevin stated. But he didn't pull his hand back.

"This is not a question." 

"... What does that mean for us?" 

Us. That little word reminded him, that they were together now. It was a pretty word. Us. 

"I don't know. I haven't fallen for anyone before. Everything I know about relationships I learned from the Internet." 

For a moment Daniel feared that Kevin would just stand up and walk away. 

But then Kevin cupped his cheek, gently with his free hand. "We are going to figure this out together, then."

Dan kissed him.

Kevin held his shoulders and pushed him a tiny bit back, so he could look into his eyes.

"Can I still call you cupcake or would it be ...inappropriate or something?"  
He sounded worried and Dan had to chuckle softly.

"I'd be really disappointed, if you stopped calling me that."

"Good."

There was a pause.

"...And... You are really ok with it? I mean this... situation. I'm sorry, I didn't tell you earlier. Collecting the souls of the dead and everything. I get that this is quite heavy stuff. And I wanted to tell you earlier, but I didn't know how."

"Yeah. Even if I knew earlier that you are ..."

"The literal god of death of Ireland."

"Not exactly human. I don't think it would have changed anything for me to be honest. Not to be a furry. I mean. You know what I mean."

"Really?"

"You never know what you get, when you get a crush on someone on the internet. I'm lucky you are not a sixty year old truck driver who was just released from prison."

"Why do you keep mentioning this? Has that happened to you before?"

"It happened to a friend."

Kevin grinned.

"Sure."

_______

The next days were more quiet. Dan had to go away a quite a few times, but it was the best thing ever to come back to Kevin, who would always be there waiting for him.  
To come home.

They made more videos, keeping their viewers in the dark about their current situation. Of course some of them shipped it already. 

"How about we play Red dead redemption, today?", Kevin asked one day.

"I'm up for it." 

"You have to count everyone I kill."

"I assume it will be a lot."

"Definitely yes."

They set everything up and then started the video.

"Kevin you can't kill everyone." 

"I can and I will." 

"Kevin no." 

"A crime without victims. Except for all the people that die." 

"Alright."

"Wait, was that insensitive?"

"It's fine."

"Good. I'm close to a new record by the way. Dan, get out the calculator."

Dan looked at him from the side with a smile.  
An idea started to form in the back of his mind. 

"Don't look at me like that. You have to keep track of the war crimes, cupcake."

"Hey, I have to keep track of my own war crimes."

_______

More days went by.  
"Do you remember the party I invited you to?", Kevin asked one morning after breakfast.

"Yes. Do you still want me to go there with you? Or should we video chat like we had planned?"

"The party has been cancelled."

"Why has it been cancelled."

"Something bees."

"Bees?"

"Yeah."

"Weird."

"We could have our own party. Have a bit of music and a bit of dancing. Maybe some games."

"Who do you want to invite?"

"You."

"Who else?"

"No one. I'm afraid, this event will be VIPs only."

Then Dans phone gave off this dreadful beeping sound again.

"I'll be back.", Dan said.

"I'll wait for you."

_______

"Stop smiling like that. You are at a crime scene.", George said. 

"Oh. Yeah. Right. I forgot."

"Have some respect."

"You are right."

He had to freeze and unfreeze time repeatedly, before his work was done.  
And on his way back, he had to make a few more stops. When the wheather was warm, people just seemed to get a bit more aggressive.

_______

When he came home, it was getting dark again. 

And he was surprised to find the flat dark as well.

But when he entered the living room, he was greeted by a sea of candles.

Kevin had pushed all his stuff and the table aside and was able to make space for a small dance floor. He had been waiting for him.

When Dan removed his jacket, Kevin let the music start playing.

"Would you like to dance with me?"

"Yes, I would."

In his arms he regretted all the time they had spend apart from each other. But in a way it had been necessary.

Kevin was a terrible dancer.  
But it was fine.  
It wasn't just fine.  
It was heaven.

Dan pulled him across the dance floor, but Kevin didn't make it easy for him and they ended up on the couch together, giggling violently.

The candles went out one after another as the tune of the music changed and the neighbours wouldn't be able to make eye contact anymore after that night.

_______

More days went by. Outside the weather got worse.

Kevin was wrapped into his arms as they sat on the couch and watched TV one night, when suddenly Dan got a new notification. 

He read it. And then he read it again. 

"Is something wrong?", Kevin asked. 

"Yeah." Dan sat up slowly.

"What is it?" 

Daniel turned to look into his eyes. His wonderful, beautiful and perfect eyes. 

Kevin pulled him even closer and kissed him gently.  
Daniel melted into the touch.  
Then he made a decision. 

"Ride with me." 

Kevin quickly got up and out of his shirt: "Oh, I can ride you like-" 

"No, not- I mean. We can do that too. No problem at all. I mean also ride with me. I mean. Please put your shirt back on I can't concentrate." 

"As you wish." Kevin very slowly put his shirt back on and Daniel waited, biting his lips. 

Dan would very much enjoy doing one thing before the other, but what he had to say was very important.  
He took a deep breath. But still he hesitated.

"Tell me what is wrong, Cupcake."

"It's complicated."

"Is this still about how I said: 'and here comes the airplane' when you-"

"No, it's not."

"Good, because I apologized often enough."

Dan took another deep breath.  
"There is a job available, because current war is retiring...and well...we need someone to take over her place when everything ends and- but you can choose your own horse, though." 

"What are you talking about?" 

Dan took a deep breath and held his hand solemnly.  
"Kevin, how familiar are you with the concept of the Apocalypse?"


	2. The Things we do for love

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Happy Birthday, ddaydream!!!!  
> Welcome to being one year closer to boomering.
> 
> ~~~~~~~
> 
> Warning for death, violence and horses.
> 
> ~~~~~~~
> 
> Thank you so much to the server for helping out with flowers, horses and general emotional support.

_**The things we do for love** _

“Tell me what is wrong, Cupcake.”

“It’s complicated.”

“Is this still about how I said: ‘and here comes the airplane’ when you-”

“No, it’s not.”

“Good, because I apologized often enough.”

Dan took another deep breath.  
“There is a job available because current war is retiring...and well...we need someone to take over her place when everything ends and- but you can choose your own horse, though.”

“What are you talking about?”

Dan took a deep breath and held his hand solemnly.  
“Kevin, how familiar are you with the concept of the Apocalypse?”

“The Apocalypse?”

“Yeah.”

“And I get a horse?”

“Well… yeah.”

“But the flip side is that the world is ending?”

“Yes. The world is ending. It just happens every few thousand years so we can start anew.”, Daniel lied.

“Feck. That’s actually… What about my friends?”

“They’ll be fine.”, Dan lied. “But the world must burn first. You do like fire. Right?”

“I do.“

“Awesome. Then it is settled. You join the horse persons of the Apocalypse.”

He kissed Kevin. Kevin kissed him back. Then he stopped.

“Something wrong?”, Dan asked, opening the first button of his shirt.

“This was all happening so fast. You are telling me, the world is ending?”

“Yes, I am.”

Kevin sat up properly and looked at Dan, in shock, finally even starting to realize, what that could mean.

_Oh, no. What if he doesn’t want to spend eternity with you? Stupid Dan. stupid stupid stupid-_

Kevin misinterpreted the fear in Dan's eyes.

“I’ll be there for you and I’ll protect you.”, Kevin said bravely, “You don’t have to be afraid.”

He hugged his boyfriend. 

Dan took a deep breath, leaning his head against his shoulder. After everything that had happened, this was one of the most surreal things. And as Kevin gently ran a hand up and down his back, he had to hold back tears.

Dan actually was afraid. Afraid of the answer to a question that had been burning on his tongue for a while. For quite a long time actually.

_Do you love me enough to spend eternity with me?_

Kevin had absolutely no reason to stay with him. Ok, it would save his life. And then again, what if he only wanted to stay with him to save his own life?

“Everything will be fine, Dan.”, Kevin said and kissed his cheek.

Dan searched for words and he was embarrassed, that his hands were shaking. But Kevin took them in his and held them. They were huge and warm.

“Is there something else you need to tell me?”, Kevin asked. 

Dan nodded and slowly he started: “Joining us would mean, that you would become immortal and-”

“Wait! This would mean, that we could stay together forever.”, Kevin exclaimed. He sounded happy.

“Would you want that?”, Dan asked, startled.

“Wouldn’t you?”

“Kevin. I- of course, I would. I-” He stopped.

“I love you, Dan and I would be glad to spend forever with you.”

Dan gaped at him. “…Ok.”

“Ok?”

“I mean. Fuck. I was scared you wouldn’t- I was scared you- I was scared.”

“No need to be scared. I will always love you.”

“You say that like you mean it. Forever is a fucking long time.”

“Why should I lie to you?”

“I love you. Kevin.”

He closed his eyes and kissed him again. In Kevin’s arms, he felt warm. His boyfriend seemed still shocked, but he had taken it better than he had expected.

“Forever is a long time.”, Dan repeated.

“As long as I can wake up every day to your smile, I’ll be fine.”, Kevin whispered. He ran a hand through his hair and Dan smiled as tears started to form in his eyes. He hadn’t cried often in all those years. And this time it wasn’t even because he was sad.

Kevin carefully kissed the tears away.

His boyfriend wasn’t yet fully comprehending what the end of the world would really mean but until then, he would make him forget everything.

Dan took his hand and lead him to the bedroom.

~~~

**_-1 week earlier-_ **

_Dan stood in front of the king of the underworld._

_“HR had been going through your files. And the numbers don’t add up. One soul is missing.”_

_“I don’t know what you are talking about.”, Dan replied._

_“Don’t lie straight to my face, Daniel. That’s not what is to expect of the Irish God of Death.”_

_Dan tried to not show the panic in him. Almost he let a gay joke slip. He was so nervous, his chest felt tight, his palms were sweaty and he had to clench his hands into fists to hide the shaking._

_“There is one human in Ireland you let slip through your fingers twice.”, the voice said. It sounded almost amused._

_Suddenly, he could feel the anger build inside of him. There was a single person he had fallen in love with. A single soul he wasn’t willing to let go of. In all these years one mistake was made and it wasn’t a mistake at all it-_

_“I never took a single vacation for six thousand years.”, Dan said loudly. His voice echoed through the darkness._

_“You’ve always done your job well. Until now.”_

_“The only payment I want is him. Let me have his soul.”_

_“Nothing in life or death comes without a price.”_

_“I’ve paid the price for thousands of years.”_ , Dan said slowly but clearly, putting an emphasis on every syllable. 

_“That is true.”, the voice admitted._

_“I want to keep him for the rest of time.”, Dan said, his voice suddenly a lot stronger. It echoed through the cavern._

_“I give you the pinky finger and you want the whole hand? Your time on earth has made you greedy. You know that you are -just like everything else between heaven and earth- are replaceable?”_

_“I know and I stand my point. Like I said. I want his soul and nothing else. For all the work I have done. I’m tired of this job.”_

_Dan stood his ground. He tried to sound brave. The silence, while his boss was thinking, weight heavily around him._

_“You really ask for immortality? For some ….human?”_

_“He is so much more than that.”_

_There was a pause. Daniel didn’t dare to breathe. He stared into the darkness until his eyes felt like they were burning._

_“Alright. But there is a price to pay.”_

_“Whatever it is. I will pay that price.”_

_“Spending thousands of years with the humans has made you soft. Maybe it is time for you to come home.”_

_“My home is where Kevin is.”_

~~~

“What are you thinking about?”, Kevin asked close to his ear before he started to plant tiny kisses on his neck and shoulders.

It was late at night and they should be asleep, but Dan had just come back from another work-related incident and Kevin had been waiting for him. The taller one had wrapped his arms around him from behind right that moment, Dan had sat down on the bed.

“There is that thing in philosophy. Some kind of riddle…”, Dan started hesitantly.

“Oh, something your friend Aristocrates said?”, Kevin mumbled into the nape of his neck. It tickled.

“Well…”, Dan chuckled.

Kevin leaned back to smile at him and when he sensed that whatever Dan was going to say, might be important he sat back on the bed, but not without pulling Dan with him to sit more comfortably.

“So the riddle goes like this: You have the option to become a powerful king. The only thing that has to happen if you chose this option is forgetting all your memories.”

“I don’t think I understand.”

Dan sighed. “If you forget all your memories you are allowed to be king. Would you do it?”

“No, because I wouldn’t be the same person.”, Kevin said. “Without your memories, you are not you.”, Kevin said, his voice very soft.

“But you could be a king.”

“I can’t imagine not remembering this moment. …Or you.”

Dan gave him a bright smile, as he gently traced a finger across his cheek. Kevin took his hand and kissed it.

“That’s the best answer one could give. Memory is the thing that defines you. Everything you are everything you will be is because of the people you met, the things that happened to you, the decisions you made.”, Dan said.

“Why did you ask?”

“Because that’s how it’s supposed to go. I give you a riddle and you solve it. -And in return, you get my heart.”, Dan said and kissed Kevin, “Don’t worry about it.”

“This was very barely a riddle and I already have your heart.”, Kevin chuckled.

“True. Now you have to ask me a question.”

Kevin laughed before he leaned back to think. Finally, he said: “If one gooblygoo is worth 5 fecks and a train goes 169 km/h how many potatoes are in my bedside drawer?”

“Two.”

“Why did you look into my bedside drawer?”

“I didn’t look into your drawer. You told me yesterday. I didn’t understand why you have them there but I love you and you are valid.”

“Do you know what else I have in my drawer?”, Kevin asked with a cheeky grin.

“No, what do you have in your drawer, Kevin?”

“The _Don’t starve together_ edition for the Playstation 4.” 

“And what do you intend to do with it?”, Dan chuckled.

“I will play as Willow.”, Kevin said before he kissed him again.

~~~

_“The end of the world in exchange for your true love.”, the voice said._

_“I take it.”_

_“You don’t even think about it?”_

_“I don’t have to. He is the only thing I want in life -and in death.”_

_“Very well. So shall it be.“_

_“Good.”, Dan said and turned to leave._

_“No remorse? Not a single tear shed for humankind?”_

_Dan stopped and said over his shoulder:_ _“You haven’t been up there in a long time. Have you?”_

_“I haven’t.”, the voice admitted._

_“He is the only thing up there worth saving.”, Dan whispered._

_“This may be a controversial opinion. …But your wish shall be granted.”_

~~~~*~~~~

_**Practice run** _

“You forgot that people are never inherently good or evil.”, George said. “I just heard the news. End of the world. Huh?”

“Awww, fuck you scared me.”, Dan replied. He had just tiptoed into the kitchen to prepare breakfast for himself and Kevin. Staring at the small creature, he leaned against the counter.

“I forgot.”, Dan said then, shrugging.

“Don’t you think that the humans don’t deserve this?”

The Irish god of death avoided his eyes and opened the fridge instead, acting like he was still deciding on what to chose for breakfast.

“The ceremony will take place at the next full moon.”, George said as Dan stayed quiet.

“That’s in three weeks.”

“You have to keep him alive until then.”

A cold feeling crept up his spine as he got eggs and milk out of the fridge. The small immortal creature was judging him and he knew it.

After he closed the door of the fridge, he leaned his head against the cold door.

“I hope he won’t get mad at me when he starts to fully understand-”, Dan whispered.

“Fully understand what?”, Kevin asked.

“Fuck!” Dan jumped and turned around, almost dropping the eggs and the milk, but Kevin caught them. Then he placed them on the table beside him.

“What did you just tell the cat?”

“Cat?”, George huffed. Then he disappeared into the living room to chew on the sofa.

“Don’t worry about it. Would you like some scrambled eggs or pancakes?”, Dan asked. “Good morning by the way. How do you feel about playing some Saints Row today?”

“Good morning.”, Kevin said. He leaned down and kissed Dan’s cheek. 

“I thought we could go on a walk in the evening.”, Dan continued, “We haven’t done something romantic in a while. Would you like coffee or tea. I’ll make tea.”

“Sure.”, Kevin said, before he helped preheat the pan. 

He gave him one last weird look, but then decided he didn’t want to ask, what this had been about.

~~~

In the evening, Dan took Kevin to a nice stroll. They walked hand in hand through the fields, somewhere Kevin was sure he hadn’t been to before. Of course, he didn’t leave the house very often, but he had thought that he knew the surrounding area at least decently enough to know where Dan was going. They watched the clouds together from a small hill, surrounded by wildflowers and friendly bees.

“Ok, Kevin, the ceremony will take place in two and a half weeks. But I was told to already show you a bit around.”

The 2.5 Million Subscriber Youtuber followed the Irish God of Death a small path he hadn’t notice before and onto a meadow, sprinkled with clover, snowdrops, dandelions, daffodils, crocuses, poppies and chicory. At the far end of the meadow, he could see sunflowers and a bush of pink roses and another kind of pink flowers, that looked like they had a very difficult name. Something about that ensemble felt wrong but Kevin couldn’t quite put the finger on it.

He picked up a dandelion and softly blew the seeds away to watch them float and dance across the meadow. Meanwhile, Dan mumbled something and a horse appeared. When Kevin turned around, it stood there like it had always stood there.

“A palomino Irish draught.”, Dan said.

“It’s the L’Oréal commercial horse.”

“No, it’s from hell.”

“Ah.”, Kevin said and carefully touched the light brown mane.

“Would you like to try it out?”, Dan asked.

“I’ve only ever seen people riding horses in movies. Do I need to take my shirt off?”

“If you want to, I’m certainly not going to stop you.”, Dan said with a chuckle. “Also you are going to need a saddle if you never sat on a horse before.”

“Oh.”

“As the second horse person of the apocalypse, you need to get along with your horse. That’s an important part of it.”

“Can I give him a name?”

“Please don’t name him Shit. We already have two plants called Shit.”

“I’ll call you Bimpson.”, Kevin whispered to the horse.

The horse seemed happy with that name.

“Why do I love you?” Dan shook his head. Then he laughed anyway.

With a smirk, Kevin took a daffodil from the ground and swiftly placed it in Daniel's hair. “I’m sure there are millions of reasons and at least three.” He stepped away from the horse to place both hands on Dan’s hips. “But I know there are at least a million reasons why I love you. The first one is that you are as cute as feck.”

Dan could sense the horse rolling its eyes. Before he could say anything else, Kevin kissed him and he forgot what he wanted to say. And also everything else. 

Meanwhile, the sun set behind the city in the distance. 

“It’s getting dark and cold, we should start to go back.”, Dan finally said.

“I have no idea how to get back. …Do you think, we could put Bimpson in the living room-”, Kevin said as he turned back to the horse. In the moonlight, the horse looked a lot different. Kevin slowly stumbled backwards, as red eyes stared at him. 

“Bones?”, Kevin said under his breath.

“No need to put him in the living room. I can just summon him again when we need him.”, Dan said.

A cloud hid the moon for a moment and when it had moved past, the horse was gone.

Kevin looked around the meadow. The flowers had faded and the grass had turned grey as the mist swirled over the ground.

“Let’s go home.”, Dan said and stretched out a hand.

The second Kevin touched it, they stood in Kevin’s living room again.

The taller one let himself fall on the couch with an ooompphh-sound. Dan sat down next to him and almost automatically, Kevin put an arm around his shoulder.

“There is not really a point in going for a walk when you can just teleport.”, he said with a weird smile.

“Teleportation is quite draining when you do it too often.”, Dan said.

“Then let me teleport you to the bedroom.”, Kevin said as he picked up Dan. They both laughed.

~~~

“Let me show you something….But I need you to behave.”, Dan said after lunch the next day.

And he took him by the hand and lead him to the living room.

Minutes later, Kevin found himself looking at the dead captain of a ship in the middle of the sea.

“There is a thing called ‘fate‘ and it’s very hard to change.”, Dan started to explain without any other introduction.

Kevin looked at Dan and then back to the guy in the captain uniform.

“There is a metaphor in a ship losing her captain. Will all the people here die, if the ship sails without a captain? Maybe. But the thing is, that there is nothing that we can do about this. …Acceptance of the unavoidable is an important part of this job-”, Dan rambled, not noticing, that Kevin had stopped listening and looked around. The floor was covered in mud. He could hear the waves splashing against the ship. He imagined the air to be salty. Feck allergies.

The ship softly got rocked by the waves.

“Do you understand, Kevin? I have to collect his soul, no matter the circumstances and there is not a lot I can do about what will happen, now that he is dead.”

“Let me steer this ship for a moment.”

“Kevin, no.”

“Kevin, yes.”

“You can’t decide who is going to die. And most importantly, you have to wait, until they die themselves and not just- Kevin!”

The ship crashed into an iceberg. 

A moment later they stood in the only lifeboat and watched the ship burn.

“Do you hear that? That’s the sound of forgiveness.”

“That’s the sound of people drowning, Kevin.”

“That’s what forgiveness sounds like. Screaming and then silence.”

They watched as the ship sunk.

“Stop moping.”

“Although you are the most annoying person ever, I love you.”, Dan said. 

Kevin took both his hands and pulled him into a close hug, so Dan’s head got pressed against his chest.

“And even though our relationship might have so many glitches it could be a Bethesda game, I love you too.”

They both took off their VR headsets.

“Ok, I kinda saw that coming and that’s why I didn’t bring you to a real job.”, Dan said, shaking his head.

“But that, what we just saw, is not my job, now, is it?”

“No. It’s not. …Put the headset back on.”, Dan sighed.

The scenery had changed. They were now in the centre of a busy street.

“You are here to cause trouble. Basically.”, Dan said. “So. Do the usual. Ignore me. I have nothing to do with that part. Except for cleaning up behind you.”

Kevin started walking past people that glitched in and out of existence. The road felt familiar although he was sure he hadn’t walked this way before. When Kevin reached into his pocket there was a knife. As he observed it, he saw that he wasn’t reflecting in it. Technically, that wasn’t too unusual for a video game, but still, it felt just enough unsettling that he had to gulp. 

When he reached the corner of the street, the traffic stopped. In the middle of the crossway, two people were engaged in a fistfight.

Kevin started running and just as he reached the crowd, one of them cowered on the ground and the other one walked away.

As no one else acted and the cars started honking louder nad louder, Kevin walked to the person who sat on the ground with a bloody nose. He helped them stand up again and without another thought, he put the knife in their hand.

“What do you want me to do with this?”, the person asked.

“Flip a coin. Heads kill them. Tails don’t let them live.”, Kevin said and gave that person a grin.

The person nodded. They started walking in the direction, the other person had left in. 

Kevin looked around and then he moved over to the next person. “Sorry, I have Amnosia, where is the next train station?” 

And just as he got told the direction, at the upper right of his vision, a number appeared. 

1

As he walked in the direction of the train station, the number got up.

2

3

It took a while until he understood, that he had started a chain reaction.

4

5

6

...

One hour later, they took their headsets off and looked at each other. The city was burning. And it had been Kevin work.

“How did I do, Cupcake?”, he asked.

“You know, it’s going to be different when you stand in front of real people.”

It became obvious to Dan that it had in fact not been clear to Kevin. “Yeah. …But like. This is only happening so that everything starts from new. Right? So it technically is like a game. Right?” 

“Sure, you can see it like that.”

Dan took both his hands and kissed them.

Was he lying to Kevin?

Not really.

It wasn’t exactly like a game… Maybe except for…, it wasn’t like a game at all.

Kevin ran a hand through his hair.

“And everything will be like just before we left the game.”, the taller one said.

Before Dan could answer, the doorbell rang.

“Did we order something?”, Kevin asked.

“No, but I invited someone over. Some old friends.”

Dan left Kevin quickly cleaning up the living room a bit, while he opened the door to let the guests in.

“Kevin? Meet Heidi and Maddison”

“I’m famine.”, Heidi said.

“And I’m pollution. But you can call me Maddie.”

“Kevin.”, Kevin said, a bit startled.

“I watched your videos. …Did you notice?“, Maddie said.

“We should have met before.”, Heidi said.

They looked like tall high school students -maybe cheerleaders- Maddie having long brown hair and Heidi having long blond hair. They were wearing long dark cloaks over pink and white blouses and skirts. First, it seemed like the cloaks were black, but as he kept looking at them, he could see into the universe and his head started to hurt.

Kevin didn’t know if he should call them Maddie or famine or Ms Maddie or what else. So his brain stopped working and he said: “Potato dude.”

“Where should we have met before, potato dude?”, Kevin asked.

“Oh, you haven’t told him.”

“Told me what?”

“Don’t worry about it, sweety.”, Heidi replied.

“Do you have any questions about your job? I can’t wait to work with you! The way you killed everyone in your Hitman Blood Money but I kill everyone on the map -video from the 31.7.2020 was just chefs kiss.”

“Thank you. …Am I going to get a cloak like that?”, Kevin asked staring at the stars and planets. They seemed to be moving ever so slowly.

“Of course you will get a cloak like that! We just need to get it changed a little, because you are a very tall person, my dude.”, Maddie said, giggling.

“Kevin, could you help me make some snacks, for a second?”, Dan asked.

“Sure. Please, take a seat, you two.”

“You can’t simply call a horse person of the Apocalypse ‘Potato dude‘.”

Kevin could.

And he did, while they had a little conversation about horses and then Kevin’s YouTube Channel.

“But we don’t want to take too much of your time left in this place.”, Heidi said after a while. Maddie didn’t seem too happy about leaving again, but they followed them anyway.

“We’ll see you at the ceremony.”, Maddie said.

Before Kevin could open the door for them, they just disappeared in a cloud of black and glittery dust.

“What do they mean with ‘we should have met before‘?”, Kevin asked, after the dust had settled on the floor. He carefully took a big step over it to stand in front of Dan.

“Nothing.”, the Irish god of Death said and turned to leave.

“Nothing?”

Kevin held his arm.

“Don’t worry about it.”, Dan said.

“I somehow feel like I should. And. I don’t understand, why you are lying to me.”, Kevin said and outed at him, looking a bit more hurt, than he had intended to.

“Let’s not talk about this right now.”

“But-”

They looked into each other's eyes. Kevin took a step forward and Dan took a step back so that he was leaning against the wall. 

“How about you follow me into the bedroom real quick and I-”

“We need to be honest with each other, Daniel.”

He knew stuff was serious when he wasn’t calling him ‘cupcake‘.

Dan reached out and cupped his face with one hand. With the other one, he intertwined their fingers.

He took a deep breath.

Then another one.

He closed his eyes.

“You should have died years ago. But I couldn’t-”, he whispered. Then he stopped.

Kevin stared at him. “I should’ve already been dead?”

“You should have already been dead …twice. And…”

“Dan? What did you do?”

The Irish god of death looked at everything but at Kevin.

“It’s an awful thing to miss someone who never left.”, he mumbled.

“What the feck are you talking about?”

“I’m not taking the chance that you might die. And since we are already having this conversation, I’m going to be completely honest with you. I-I-”

He felt like he couldn’t breathe. In front of him, Kevin was panicking, while trying hard to keep his voice low. He had never yelled at him. And he wouldn’t start now.

“Dan. What have you done?”

“I have done what was necessary. I- I exchanged your soul for … everyone else's.”, Dan said.

They were quiet for a while. 

Kevin couldn’t understand. 

And Dan waited patiently.

And they both suffered.

“But. What about-”

“You are the only thing worth saving.”, Dan interrupted him. He held his trembling hand a bit closer.

“What about puppies and sunsets and the colour green-”

Dan kissed him to shut him up. He pressed him against the opposite wall and Kevin immediately kissed him back. “Please, stop talking.”, Dan mumbled against his mouth, before he kissed him again.

Suddenly Kevin remembered, what they had been talking about and he pushed him very gently away, just enough so he could look into his eyes. “Dan, you can’t do this. You can’t just do this.”

“Look at all the damage they have done. Maybe the world isn’t worth saving.”

“Dan.”, Kevin said softly. “A lot of problems would be solved if all humans would start to see all other humans as humans and-”

“But they won’t. They are never going to.”

Kevin looked into his eyes and saw centuries of hurt. 

“Nothing in this world is going to change my feelings for you.”, Dan said.

“They can change. Humanity _can_ change.”

“That’s not your decision to make.”

“Yours neither.”, Kevin said.

Dan wanted to make everything ok for Kevin because he deserved the world. But he could only stand there and stare at him, unable to find comforting words.

“….Why me?”, Kevin suddenly whispered.

“I think I loved you long before I met you.”, Dan replied softly.

Kevin stared into the distance.

“Kevin?... I’m so sorry. I’m so sorry. I-” Dan looked like he was going to start crying when his boyfriend pulled him into a hug. He buried his face against his chest, while Kevin gently rubbed his back. “It would feel wrong not to kiss you now.”

When their lips touched again, Dan could feel a little bit of the pain go away.

“I’d rather go to hell with you than go to heaven without you. You know that right?”, Kevin said hoarsely.

Dan shook his head. 

“It’s true. So we need to talk about this. Ok? We’ll talk about this again in the morning.”

“Ok.”, Dan said with almost no tone.

~~~

At night Kevin couldn’t sleep at all. 

Dan had to leave two times to collect souls. And while he was gone, Kevin stared at the ceiling, missing the warm body next to him.

He couldn’t understand at all.

All he knew was that he loved Dan and trusted him. Wanted to trust him.

When Dan wanted the world to end, he probably also had other good reasons. Not just him, right?

Dan was a reasonable and very intelligent person- no. God even. He had been around for a long time and he should know what he was doing.

Right?

_Right?_

~~~~*~~~~

_**As it turns dark** _

When Dan entered the living room the next day, Kevin sat just there staring at the black screen of the TV.

“You should try not to think about all of this too much.”, Dan said softly.

“It’s pretty fecking hard not to.”

“We could go to the game store together. Buy a new game. Make a new video.”, Dan said.

Kevin just nodded.

On their walk there, Kevin wouldn’t let go of his hand.

“You look tired.”, Dan said.

“Thanks, it’s because I didn’t sleep.”

“A little bit of fresh air will help. And. …When we get home, I could make you some warm milk and you could take a nap.”

His boyfriend just nodded and squeezed his hand a bit tighter.

When they entered the game shop, Dan’s phone gave the alarm of a new job. The cashier of the game shop had just died. They froze as they looked into the eyes of a guy with a gun, currently stealing the money from the cash register.

“Watch out! Dan!”, Kevin yelled.

Everything happened really fast. Kevin jumped in front of him, when two shots were fired. Both hit Kevin. Dan held his hand, unable to comprehend anything as his boyfriend slowly sunk to his knees. The man let his empty gun fall to the ground next to them before he ran out of the shop.

Dan was unable to stop time. Why couldn't he stop time?

“Dan.”

“Kevin? You need to stay with me. Can you hear me?”

There was no answer.

Dan touched his face and then tried to apply pressure to the wounds.

“Please stay with me.”, he whispered.

No pulse.

“Kevin?”

And in his arms, Kevin died.

Above him, there was the wilted flower floating. A gentle breeze took it and carried it away.

A hooded figure caught it before Dan could react.

“Wait, our boss promised me his soul.”, Dan said.

“He chose his own path.”, The hooded figure answered.

“He didn’t! He was killed! They took him from me!”, Dan yelled. His throat hurt from his voice breaking.

“You were too late.”, the hooded figure said. Then they tilted their head, as if they were smirking through the darkness they were hiding their face behind, “And also: You are no longer responsible for the deaths in Ireland.”

And with that, the hooded figure was gone.

Dan tried to follow, but time was gliding through his hands and slipping through his fingers, as he still hung onto Kevin’s lifeless body.

Everything felt numb from the pain. He didn’t notice the sirens get louder. Didn’t see the police bringing him away. It was hard to let go of Kevin and he couldn’t entirely let go-

Fog clouded his eyes, as he cried soundlessly.

~~~

Dan sat on the bed in his prison cell, head leaned against the wall and stared at the ceiling.

They had questioned him for hours. 

Dan hadn’t said a word.

He had lost his job and he had lost Kevin.

Maybe this meant that the world wasn’t ending after all.

But his world had certainly ended.

Nothing mattered anymore.

“Hi. I’m Martin. Why are you here?”, the other prisoner said in a soft voice. He was a short man and looked a bit like he could play the Santa Claus at a family Christmas dinner.

Dan didn’t reply. Everything was numb and his head hurt from leaning against the cold concrete wall but he didn't feel the power to change his position.

“Have you seen the news article about me?” The man waited for an answer, but as Dan still acted like he hadn’t noticed him yet, he continued: “Not to brag, but I’m the Junkyard Ripper.” His voice was still friendly but now in a weirder way than before.

Dan sighed soundlessly.

“Do you know what that means? I killed 18 people. And that’s just the number they found so far. That’s going to give me a lot of years. but it doesn’t matter”, the man added. How could they have ended up in the same prison cell? That was not how things were supposed to work.

Dan, however, continued to stare at the ceiling, unimpressed.

“Some scientists estimate the number of people ever lived is 107 billion. Do you know how many dead people that is? Do you think you are special?”

“Why are you here, son?”, the man asked more softly.

“They think I killed my boyfriend.”

“So you killed just one person. Pathetic.”

Dan finally gave him a look that made him sit down on his bed at the opposite wall and shut up.

The former Irish god of death stood up slowly, glaring at him.

“Why is it suddenly so cold in here?”, the other prisoner asked, a bit shaken.

Both of them almost fell over as there suddenly was the loud sound of something exploding.

Another smaller explosion and there was a hole in the wall between them.

“Are ye done?”, an elderly man asked, peeking through the hole in the wall.

“It took you long enough, Jim. Also look, Jim, I made a new friend.”, Martin replied.

“Hello, new friend.”, Jim said.

Dan and Martin quickly crept through the hole in the wall, following Jim, as the sirens went off. They started running.

“It was interesting to meet you.”, Martin yelled before he stopped a car and pulled the driver off his seat. “Hop in, boy.”

Without understanding why he did it, Dan climbed into the car to sit in the backseat behind Jim.

“Where can I drop you off?”, Martin asked.

Dan gave him Kevin’s address.

“Then buckle in, son.”

~~~

“You can find me at the junkyard. Or I will find you at the junkyard.”, Martin had said before he drove off. “If you want to establish your career as a killer. …If you need a mentor so to say.”

Dan stared at the black screen of the TV.

Just like Kevin had only hours earlier. In his head, he imagined, that the space was still warm.

Making a sound, like he had been punched into the stomach, he got to his feet. 

Dan walked through the apartment, picking up games from the floor and placed them in the shelves, picked up socks, threw empty packages away.

He didn’t want to see order. He wanted to see the world burn.

Everything looked like Kevin would be back any minute now. -Maybe bringing milk from the supermarket. Then joking about white fluids, walking past him, not without giving him a kiss and then proceeding to sit in front of the work computer to film a new video or edit something.

Dan had watched him work very often. How he sometimes glanced back at him and gave him this little evil smirk when he was about to torture Sims or other characters from whatever game he was currently playing.

“Please come home.”, Dan whispered.

He leaned against the wall, Kevin had pushed him against only days ago heavily making out with him. He remembered the feeling of Kevin’s body pressed against him. The warmth of his skin, although his hands were sometimes cold and Kevin had often used that to his advantage to make Dan laugh uncontrollably. The softness of his touch. The tickling of his beard in his face and neck.

The way he laughed.

The way he looked at him.

He slid to the floor, back pressed against the wall, shaking as tears streamed down his face.

He tried to hold on to that image of Kevin smiling at him but all his thoughts got distorted and too loud. He covered his ears and screamed until all the air had left his lungs.

The image of Kevin’s expression when he died in his arms was burned in the inside of his eyelids. When he closed his eyes, all he could see was this. And he couldn’t open his eyes.

~~~

The next time, George checked on him, Dan was sitting on the couch again.

“You can’t sit around all day.”

“I need to get him back from the underworld.”

“That has never worked before.”, George said.

“Fuck that.”

“You seem a bit upset.”, George said.

Dan stood up and tried to summon his cloak. It didn’t work. He let out a sound of angry exasperation.

“I wanna watch the world burn I wanna make the world burn …I’m just a bit upset.”

His voice echoed through the empty apartment.

“You need to calm down.”

“NO! I don’t. I- I- I’m getting him out of there.”, he said. 

He stood up and took Kevin’s second black leather jacket from their piles of clothes next to the door. 

“Daniel.”

“I’d do anything for him.”

And he was gone before George could follow.

~~~

One hour later, Dan walked across the junkyard. There were just piles of old garbage, most things scattered and broken. He walked through a labyrinth of old stuff for almost half an hour.

“Daniel! I hadn’t expected you so early.”, a familiar voice behind him suddenly said.

He didn’t reply. 

“I knew you would want a mentor! There is so much I could teach you, son!”, Martin said. “Just wait until Jim hears about this. He’s on his way to London to get the old gang together. Imagine how much fun the five of us could have if you joined!”

Dan stepped closer, looking down at the serial killer.

The other man looked up at him and pulled him into a fatherly hug. "C'mere.", he said.

“I’m not even sorry.”, Dan said as he took a small step back.

Martin opened his mouth. Blood came out.

As he looked down, Dan pulled his knife out of the man's chest.

“I don’t need a mentor.

Martin fell to the ground in front of him.

“Now I have to wait for someone.”, Dan explained calmly. He walked over to a garden chair and sat there to watch him.

The soil got drenched in red as he waited, staring at him. It took a while until a flower started floating.

When the other Grim Reaper appeared, Dan jumped back to his feet and with two steps, he was next to them.

He pushed them against a small hill with garbage. Old lamps, toasters and mixers scattered to the ground next to them.

Dan raised his knife against their throat.

“You can’t be serious.”, the other Grim Reaper said.

This voice…

He pulled the hood down.

“Kathleen?”

“Yes.” 

She looked like a boring middle-aged woman with brown hair. And she was boring. Really. She had worked at the side of the judges of the underworld for many centuries as some kind of secretary. A secretary which finally wanted a promotion.

“Oh, I knew you wanted this job.”, he hissed.

She summoned her scythe and at the same moment, she pushed him away, with her hand flat against his chest almost making him fall over.

Dan punched in her direction but she got to her knees surprisingly fast, before she kicked his leg away, making him fall to the ground, face in the dirt.

When he swung her scythe at him, he caught it mid-air and ripped it from her hands. 

“Oh, Go to hell-”

Taking a step forward, he hit her head with the back of it and she fell to the ground next to Martin staring into is empty eyes. 

Dan leaned down, pressing her against the ground, with his foot against her upper back and whispered: “No one is going to die anymore until I get Kevin back. Do you understand?”

She nodded. “I don’t even like this job.”, she whispered.

“I can’t kill you, because you are immortal like me, but I can follow you everywhere and make your existence a living hell. Do you want that?”

She shook her head.

“Good. You are going back to your home, tell the others and you are not going to move again. Do you understand?”

She nodded.

“Good.”

The moment he let go of her, she disappeared in a swirl of blue dust.

“What on earth have you done?”, George asked from behind him. He had watched the scene unfold with horror.

“I had no other choice.”

“Yes, you definitely had.”, George said.

They watched the flower float above Martin. As it had not been picked up, it slowly glided down again until it landed on the man’s forehead to become invisible once more.

Martin gasped.

“Sorry about earlier, man. You’ll be fine in two days. I’m calling an ambulance and the police. They should be really glad to have you back, _buddy_.”

And with that, he turned and walked off, doing a few phone calls, trying to cover his face as well as he could, worried that someone might recognize him. George followed him with quick steps.

They were almost back at the flat when Dan’s phone gave a notification. Curious, he took it out of his pocket.

A new video.

It felt like a knife tearing through his heart.

He closed his eyes for a moment, leaning against the closest wall.

Kevin had prepared the video the day before and scheduled and automatic upload.

His fingers felt like they didn’t belong to him when he tapped on the video.

Everything around him disappeared. The buildings. The cars. The people. 

“Hey, there friends how is it going? My name is Kevin and today we are going to do something a little bit different. 

Do you remember Dan the villain, also known as Rumble Tumble Games?”

Dan paused the video to wipe the tears away with his sleeve. He tried to breathe but there was no air in his lungs. Only pain.

It was only a shadow of the real Kevin, only a tiny bit of his soul captured and brought back to half a life by-

by whatever phones were made of these days.

He pressed play again.

“Dan? This song is for you.”

“Kevin.”, Dan whispered hoarsely.

He had listened to him practice this song for months.

Under the shower.

Before bed.

While cooking.

His voice was very soft and he seemed so nervous.

The guitar he was holding seemed so small.

_“Love of mine_

_someday you will die_

_but I’ll be close behind_

_I’ll follow you into the dark.”_

“I’ll follow you into the dark.”, Dan repeated.

_“…or tunnels to gates of white_

_just our hands clasped so tight_

_waiting for the hints of a spark_

_If heaven and hell decide-”_

Dan paused the video again.

“They are not going to decide. You said it’s not my decision to make but it is. I decide to bring you back, no matter what.”, he whispered.

~~~~*~~~~

_**On my way** _

Will had worked for two months at the game shop before the robbery. Had wanted to earn some extra money to finally follow his dream and become a demon hunter. His first job was being an electrician and he was good at his job, but he had always been interested in ghosts and mythology. There had been a lot of things he had planned in life. Buy more tripods. Get new Emotes for his Twitch Channel. Read a book. Catch a ghost.

Now he was dead.

“Hey, I know you.”, the tall guy in the boat next to him suddenly said. He had been staring at him for a while. “I think I was there when you died.”

“I’m Will.”, Will said. “Nice to meet you. Wait, I recognize you. You are that Youtuber guy that sometimes comes to the shop with his boyfriend and you bragged about having owned the shop before you got hit by a car.”

“Yeah, but that’s quite the long title. You can call me Kevin.”

They shook hands.

“How did you get here? Got hit by a second car?”

Kevin flinched a bit before he replied: “I got shot right after you.”

“Oh, I’m sorry, dude. My condolences.”

“My condolences to your death as well.”

Except for the ferryman they were alone on the boat.

The water of the Styx was as clear as glass. Kevin was surprised to see fishes and these colourful funny looking plants he had seen on the Telly. As they drove down the river, it got warmer and he started to hear …noises. Groaning. Torches were lighting up the walls and ceiling which were made of stone, the same colour as -

“Why does this remind me of Minecraft so much?”, Kevin asked.

“Why does this remind you of Minecraft? The clouds here are pretty-”

“Clouds?”

Suddenly a voice came from the old man steering the boat: “One of the perks of being here is that the dead only see whatever they believe comes after death.”

“Does this means I’m really going to heaven?”, Will asked.

“If that is what you believe in, then yes.”

“Feck.”, Kevin said under his breath.

“Wait. Do you believe you are ending up in Minecraft Hell, Kevin?”

“Actually no.”

“What do you believe in?”

“…That my boyfriend will come and pick me up.”

Then they were quiet again.

“I hope my brother will feed my cat.”, Will mumbled more to himself than to Kevin.

The noises got louder, but still, they were steering through something that looked like a tunnel. 

Kevin stood up, almost making the boat flip over, walked to the front and tapped on Charon's shoulder.

“I hate to be a Karen, but can I speak to the manager, please?”, Kevin asked.

“Do you know how many people want to speak to the manager?”

“I was supposed to replace the old war as a horse person of the Apocalypse.”

The old man stopped the boat before he slowly turned around.

“You are Kevin.”, he stated.

“You know me?”

“Your boyfriend invited me to the ceremony. Daniel is one of the beings who had worked here the longest. Right after human life started he had been here.”

He felt a sense of pride for his boyfriend. Wait. Feck. Pride was a sin, wasn’t it? Well, now it was pretty late for thoughts like that. Right on the way to Minecraft hell.

“Is the ceremony still taking place?”, Kevin asked.

“I’m not sure. You are not supposed to be here.”

“Can I come to the ceremony?”, Will asked from the other end of the boat.

“Can Will come to the ceremony?”

“It’s your ceremony.”

“I’m inviting Will.”

“Thank you, dude.”, Will said.

Charon shook his head with a chuckle.

“So it’ll be. I’m bringing you two to the office then.”

~~~

The ‘office‘ didn’t look like an office at all. It looked like a cathedral. Will was hiding behind the much taller Kevin.

“Hey, is someone here?”, Kevin yelled and his voice echoed back at him. 

Then there was another sound.

~~~~*~~~~

_**At the end of the world** _

Dan walked over the meadow of flowers and through the gates of hell, George following him, trying to talk his plan out of him.

After walking the staircase of misery for a while, Dan noticed that he was alone again.

Blood dripped down the walls.

When he arrived at the river Styx, Charon was nowhere to be seen. Kathleen probably had done how she had been told and there were no new souls to be picked up. So he started walking on the small path next to the water. Blood kept dripping down the walls and coloured the water red. 

If Kevin was with him, he would make a soup joke about the river and Dan’s eyes filled with tears again.

Across the river, guarding the gates of the underworld was Cerberus. Dan was painfully reminded of how much Kevin loved dogs. He hoped Charon didn’t let him pet the three-headed creature of hell, since he knew Cerberus would every once in a while eat a human soul when no one was looking. Beyond Cerberus was where the Judges of the underworld decide where to send the souls of the dead — to the Isles of the Blessed, or otherwise to Tartarus. But to which part of the underworld did they bring Kevin? There were several options.

While Tartarus is not considered to be directly a part of the underworld, it is described as being as far beneath the underworld as the earth is beneath the sky.

The Asphodel Meadows were a place for ordinary or indifferent souls who did not commit any significant crimes, but who also did not achieve any greatness or recognition that would warrant them being admitted to the Elysian Fields. It was where mortals who did not belong anywhere else in the underworld were sent.

Kevin was everything but ordinary.

The _Mourning Fields on the other hand_ was a section of the underworld reserved for souls who wasted their lives on unrequited love.

Also, this didn’t fit Kevin, since his love had been more than requited.

_Elysium_ was a place for the especially distinguished. It was ruled over by Rhadamanthus, and the souls that dwelled there had an easy afterlife and had no labours. Usually, those who had proximity to the gods (which Kevin technically had) were granted admission, rather than those who were especially righteous or had ethical merit, however, later on, those who were pure and righteous were considered to reside in Elysium. Most accepted to Elysium were demigods or heroes. 

The Fortunate Isles or _Isles of the Blessed_ were islands in the realm of Elysium. When a soul achieved Elysium, they had a choice to either stay in Elysium or to be reborn. If a soul was reborn three times and achieved Elysium all three times, then they were sent to the Isles of the Blessed to live in eternal paradise.

Dan stepped in front of the judges. They were tall dark creatures sitting in front of notebooks and exchanging hushed words.

“Hello, Janet. I’m looking for the soul of Kevin o’Reilly. Where did you send him?”

“No Kevin o’Reilly walked past here in the last several years.”, Janet said.

He tried to summon his scythe and this time it actually appeared. His powers were coming back.

_Why_?

“If he is not here, where did he go?”, he asked as he pointed the scythe at the judges.

“How are we supposed to know? You’ll have to ask in the office. There is chaos down here since the humans have stopped dying up there. Something with the software probably has gone wrong.”, muttered the judge next to Janet.

~~~

Dan had walked this way only twice before and he could feel the air changing as he got closer and closer to _the office_. There was some sort of electricity sparkling with every step he took.

When he opened the door of the cathedral-like building, he found Kevin sitting in the office. Sitting there like in the waiting room of the dentist, he had gone with Dan to. He looked happy and alive and Dan couldn’t believe that he stood right in front of him.

He looked perfectly happy and ...alive.

“Dan!”

Kevin jumped to his feet to run up to him and picked him up from the ground as he kissed him.

He wiped his tears away.

“Fecking hell, I missed you. I missed you so much.”

“I missed you, too.”, Dan said as he ran his hands over Kevin’s back, pulling him close, clinging onto him. 

“It’s ok, Dan. I’m here.”

“They gave you your body back.”, Dan mumbled against his chest, fingers clutching the fabric of his shirt.

“Yes, and they improved it. Look how high I can raise my arms.”

He looked up.

The ceiling was dark. There were small dots of lights blinking in all colours of the rainbow. 

“The ceiling is gay.”, Kevin whispered as he followed his eyes. Dan had to chuckle. He squeezed his hand as tightly as he could.  
  


“How did you find me?”, Kevin asked.

“I’m number one kevviee trash.”

“I can see that. You shouldn’t be here.”

“I’m the Irish god of death. I can go wherever I want.”

And the Irish god of death had to stand on tiptoes to kiss his boyfriend again. He wrapped both arms around his neck and gave his best not to cry. Kevin carefully ran a hand through his hair as he pulled him into a close embrace with the other arm.

“You are not mad at me?”, Dan asked more quietly.

“Why should I be mad?”

“Because I couldn’t save you, up there. You shouldn’t be here in the first place.”

“I’m a strong independent human and I’m saving the both of us, don’t worry.”

As they talked, a flower started growing in the middle of the room. As it blossomed, each leaf glowed faintly in a different colour. 

When he noticed the flower, Dan stepped back from Kevin and picked up the scythe from the ground where he had let it fall, when he saw his boyfriend. He raised it but Kevin held his arm.

“Don’t.”, he mouthed.

Dan bit his lips.

“But-”

“Kindness has to start somewhere. Be kind first and someday you will get kindness back.”, Kevin said very solemnly.

“I lost you once. And I refuse to do it again.”

“Wait for what the flower has to say.”, Kevin said softly and his voice echoes through the room as the leaves started to fall one after the other, losing their colour and before they hit the ground, they turned to glass. But with each leaf that fell off, a new one started to grow and each one was more vibrant and lively than the one before.

Suddenly, a voice came from the flower. “It doesn’t really suit you to be dead, does it?”

The voice sounded in-between in every way. Young and incredibly old at the same time. It sounded like it wasn’t spoken at all. Sounded, like it was just there.

“I’ll do anything-”, Dan started.

“Silence.”

Dan held onto Kevin with one hand and with the other he grabbed the scythe tighter until his knuckles went white.

“I had to get you here a bit earlier because of some scheduling issues. Congratulations, Mr o’Reilly, you are now a horse person of the Apocalypse. Here is your sword and here is your health insurance.”

Kevin stepped forward and picked up the sword and a white piece of paper from the ground. He crumbled the piece of paper into his trousers pocket, before he rean his hand over the sword. The blade was pitch black. And when he looked over at Dan, he smiled.

“I’m thinking.”, the voice from the flower said. “Maybe we don’t need to go through with the Apocalypse right now…”

“There is no need to rush things.”, Dan said.

“The world is ending in three years anyway. We might as well wait until then. Get better prepared.”

“Is there something we can do? To prevent it from happening at all?”, Kevin asked.

“No, there isn’t. And giving you still got your position as Horsepersons of the Apocalypse, since we are terribly understaffed, is the only thing I can do for you at this point.”

“Is there still going to be a ceremony?”, Will asked. He had been sitting on his chair, watching them the whole time.

Before anyone answered, the ground started to shake. In the distance, a loud rumbling could be heard. It came closer and closer. The lights from the ceiling disappeared and Kevin laid his arms around Dan protectively. When they opened their eyes again, the walls of the cathedral-like building had disappeared. The ceiling was still covered with stars and the ground still reminded Kevin of Minecraft but the walls of the cave were a lot further away.

~~~

Maddie and Heidi appeared in a whirl of black dust. And a second later, Charon stood next to them.

Far away, a faint melody started playing. The melody reminded Kevin of playing Sims. He smiled. The light coming from the flower in the middle of the room changed to become more golden.

“Do you accept the sword of war?”, the voice from the flower asked.

“I do.”, Kevin said, staring at the blade. It felt surprisingly light in his hands. Dan was still clasping his arm tightly, too afraid to let go. Too afraid to lose him again.

“Do you promise to honour this blade and cause chaos and mayhem when the time is due?”, the voice from the flower asked.

“I promise.”

“Do you promise to stand by the other horse persons of the apocalypse to fight by their side at the end of the earth when everything is over and time has died?”

“I do.”

“You are now officially a horse person of the Apocalypse.”

Kevin nodded. “Thank you.”, he brought out, his voice raspy.

“Congrats, Kevin.”, Dan said and hugged him. The other creatures of the underworld clapped.

With a huge grin, Maddie walked over and put a black cloak over his shoulders. As soon as he touched the cold fabric with his hands, small lights started to sparkle, forming galaxies.

The tune of the music changed, as tables appeared out of nowhere and a meal was brought in by Bird-like creatures with hooves. They reminded Kevin of parrots. Other creatures appeared and Kevin remembered vaguely learning about them in school.

Quickly, the creatures of the underworld surrounded the table to get some cake first. There were also fries and salads and all sorts of food, Dan hadn’t eaten in a very long time.

“Kathleen hasn’t appeared yet.”, Maddie said next to him as they stood in line to get food.

“She left.”, Heidi explained.

“Does that mean I have to go back to work?”, Dan asked, innocently.

“Would you like to do that?”, the flower asked.

He looked at the flower and then at Kevin, who was just putting cake, fries and beans on a plate with one hand, while he was still holding onto Daniel with the other one. Everyone looked at them.

“No. I’d like to be able to spend more time with Kevin. I don’t need two jobs. Well. Three if you count my YouTube channel. Four with Twitch.”

“I bet I could do Kevin’s boyfriends job.”, Will said. He pushed Kevin a bit to the side, to get a bigger piece of cake and something that was glowing in a blue-ish light.

It became very silent all of a sudden. Everyone looked at him, as they had clearly forgotten, he was still there.

“You are hired.”, the flower finally said.

“Thank you.”, Will said as the creatures started cheering again.

When everyone was concentrating on the meal again, Kevin and Dan went back to the middle of the room to stand right in front of the flower.

“And we can’t do anything to stop the Apocalypse?”, Kevin asked quietly.

“Nothing. Unless hell freezes over.”, the flower said. And with that, it wilted and faded away. A sign that the conversation was over and there was nothing else left to do.

“I want to go home.”, Kevin whispered.

It had gotten a lot darker and these last days had been very exhausting to him. To both of them, really. Dan could sense that he was feeling weak and he knew that it was a long way back.

“I have an idea.”, he suddenly said.

He stepped to the side and started whispering something and deep inside Kevin understood what he was saying.

“Bimpson!” Kevin hugged the horse after it pushed its nose into his side from behind.

The horse seemed happy.

“You are never allowed to name anything again.”, Dan said.

“Do you have to leave, already?”, Maddie asked as they and Heidi approached.

“Yes. We belong up there. To cause chaos and …keep things interesting. We also need to upload new videos. I don’t even know how much time has passed.”, Kevin explained.

Maddie handed him a leaf from the flower. Although it looked like glass, it had the texture of a normal leaf. Heidi handed another one to Dan. “A reminder that we will meet again.”, they whispered.

And then they left; but it was in a lot less dramatic way because they sat down with the other creatures of the underworld again to finish the rest of the meal. Will waved at them as Maddie and Heidi sat down on each side of him. 

“Can you help me to sit up there, Dan?”

"Sure."

Dan had to push him from behind to help him sit on it. “Your ass is going to hurt is fuck tomorrow morning, but at least we don’t have to walk. And teleporting is not really working down here.”

The horse started walking in a circle.

“Maybe you could help me ...steer the horse?”

“I actually have my own horse, Kevin.”

“I don’t know how to ride a horse. Riding you is a lot easier and-”

“SHhh!”, Dan had to chuckle. “Alright. Fine.”

With a grin, Kevin pulled him up to sit in front of him and wrapped his arms around him, his head leaning against his shoulder.

“I wouldn’t trade you for the entire world, either.”, he whispered.

~~~

“How do you feel?”, Dan asked as they finally arrived at the gates to the underworld.

“I don’t know what happened, but yes I love you too and yes I’m happy.”

“We fecked up pretty much, didn’t we?”, Dan said.

“We are better at playing video games anyway.”

When they could see the sky again, they said goodbye to Bimpson to go the rest of the way by foot.

Dan leaned his head against Kevin’s shoulder and Kevin wrapped an arm around him, as they walked.

“I promised that I will stay with you forever.”, Kevin said.

“You did.”

“And I keep my promise. I love you, cupcake. Daniel.”

“I love you more.”

~~~

Days later they walked together through the streets of Dublin, holding hands.

“It was stupid to think this was about us. The world is ending this way or another.”, Dan said quietly.

“There was never something we could do.”

“I’m so sorry, you had to go through all of this.”

“Don’t be. They still have time.”

“How can you still be optimistic? We are doing our best to slow the process down. But if it's not in three years, it’s in a hundred years, and what will we do then?” Dan looked in his eyes. He didn’t see any hurt, which worried him.

“Three years is a long time. A hundred even longer. And who knows? Things may not look good right now. But. Maybe hell _will_ freeze over... Maybe everything will turn out fine.”

Kevin stood still to give him another soft kiss. Sirens were loud, as police cars drove past them. 

“I love you, Dan.”, Kevin said, “My cupcake.”

Smoke was filling the air as people were screaming around them.

Dan cupped his face and kissed him again. “I love you, too.”

And together they watched the world burn.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Happy Birthday again and have a nice day! <3
> 
> ~~~
> 
> This is the Playlist I made:  
> https://open.spotify.com/playlist/2udPUbZRzZyuqpbC6JCrHY?si=cLqkuWSyTvaQKiZCsVGt8A

**Author's Note:**

> This also has a playlist:  
> https://open.spotify.com/playlist/2udPUbZRzZyuqpbC6JCrHY?si=IyKDPnnbSuOVUBrab0Kg0g
> 
> Leave a comment and tell me what you think.


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